Peer Review of Lisa’s Application Package Draft

To: Lisa Liang, member of Peanut
From: Amy Yung, member of Peanut
Subject: Peer Review of Application Package Draft
Date: December 16, 2019

Hi Lisa,

Your peer review for the draft of your application package has been completed. The application package is well-designed and organized, but there are spacing problems with the reference letter requests. The peer review includes overall impressions and comments/suggestions for each section of the application package draft. Your questions are welcome.

Organization, Style and Design:

Each part of the application package is well-organized and the resume stands out with the use of color to highlight the name. However, a darker color may be preferable because the light color used is hard to read in a bright environment. Moreover, as mentioned previously, the reference letter requests has spacing problems where the addresses are on the previous page instead of being on the same page as the reference letter request.

Cover Letter:

The cover letter is structured correctly where the date and hiring company information is listed at the top of the page. Moreover, the cover letter highlights strengths and applicant’s experience in the field. However, the cover letter can be improved if more details were included as to why this job position is of interest. Currently, the cover letter seems to be vague and not entirely tailored to this specific position. Adding statements about what is interesting about the school or achievements of the school would be a good addition.

Resume:

The resume is well-designed where skills and abilities, work and volunteer experience and hobbies and interests have their own sections. Moreover, it is well-organized, so it is easy to read. However, an education section should be added instead of listing it at the top of the page. Having an education section makes it easier to read. Furthermore, contact information should be added at the top of the page, so employers can take note of it when they first read the resume.

Reference Letter Requests:

The reference letter requests are all tailored to each referee. Moreover, they all consisted of a brief summary of how the experience with the referee which aids them in remembering the applicant. Furthermore, the brief summary highlights how the applicant’s experience with the referee is valuable to them.

Job Posting:

Job posting included matches the application package. Moreover, the job description and requirements are clearly listed. However, the job posting is incorrectly cited where “19 April 2019” should be “19 November 2019”.

Grammar and Typos:

There are some typos in this application package. In the cover letter, the letter “field” is misspelled as “filed” in the third paragraph. Furthermore, in the hobbies and interest section, interest should be plural and only the first item listed needs to be capitalized. Lastly, in the third reference letter request, a connection word is missing in the sentence, “I believe that you will be a reference…” and the closing statement should be capitalized.

Concluding Comments:

Overall, your draft of the application package is well done. The cover letter is detailed and the resume is well-designed. After implementing changes to the structure of the resume, additional details to the cover letter, fixing minor typos and adjusting the spacing of each page, the application package will be much improved. Please contact me at ayung.024@alumni.ubc.ca if you have any questions.

 

Link to Lisa’s application package draft:  http://blogs.ubc.ca/engl301-99a-2019wa/2019/12/12/application-package-draft-3/

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