The city seemed almost familiar. The communist style buildings with concrete fences painted in yellow and metal poles sticking out at the top – so much alike Ha Noi. The dark alleys at night and small worn down convenient stores where I can bread for an equivalent of $1CAD. But then the city also has enormous shopping centres like Galleria, flooded with UNIQLO ads, and streets, buzzing with a language I am not used to and most people don’t speak English, so I’m stuck on my own if I ever need help. A sense of uncertainty creeps in me when I see that the city guide warned against going home alone at night, but I stay out late anyway. I wouldn’t say St. Petersburg makes me feel safe, but it entices and seduces me.

I felt so small in this huge city of 5 million, even though I grew up in Ha Noi with 7 million, so I should be used to the traffic that doesn’t calm down even until 9 pm, used to the crowded pavements without smiles and the impersonal feeling that big cities bring. But it was the first time in a long time I felt so private and nostalgic – the city brings back so many familiar feelings of my days in Singapore, racing against rush hour and caught up in the hectic lifestyle.

But I also felt so small because the weight of history in the cultural landmarks. This is not a new city. It has its poetic and dilapidated and glamourous angles. It has its sparkling and hidden and jaded corners. Couples hold hands and kiss late night on the metro. People yell at each other on the street for accidentally bumping into each other. Each person lives their own life and finds their own space in this vast city.

So yes, somehow the most impersonal place I’ve been to so far seemed the most at home to me. Which can’t be true – I could not understand any Russian to be able to feel comfortable! But somehow I remember my roots.

Digging my way through the metro (because the metro is very deep in St. Petersburg – it takes about 3-5 minutes to get to the surface), I finally made it to Avtovo – considered one of the most beautiful metro stations in the world. I was simply overwhelmed. For a city that clearly designs for cars and has much less consideration for bikes or pedestrians, it is so wonderfully vested in creating such an amazing metro system. It’s almost romantic to take the train and indulge in this alluring city.