Tag Archives: Paraphrase

Example 39- Undergraduate student in arts

Social Sciences, Undergraduate Students, Leave a comment

Source text:

It used to be only five to ten percent of people developed allergic reactions to antibiotics, mainly penicillin. Now, as more and more individuals are exposed to antibiotics more and more often, increasing number of people are developing allergic reactions to drugs. (From (McKenna, J. 1998, p.29)

Writer’s text:

In the past, only 5% to 10% of the people are allergic to antibiotics, primarily penicillin. Now, as antibiotics are used more and more often, increasing number of people are developing allergic effects. (McKenna, 1998, p.29)

Writer’s comment:

I did not use quotation marks because it was too long. I changed a few words in there.

Student’s comment:

  1. But she didn’t use quotation marks…Seems like that the student has recognized the source text said it best, but for whatever reason didn’t want actually quote the source text…I mean there are ways to quote long passages, and there would also be ways to not say in the exactly the same way. So it’s much better that he did use the source text, but same thing I think should be quoted. (A Master’s student in Library & Information Studies)
  2. I would prefer a quotation. I think that quotation chunk dot dot dot continuing quotation would have been a better way of representing this, cause they have it succeeded in rephrasing it enough. So my hunch is that I would have said “just go to the quote on this one”. (A PhD student in Education)

Faculty member’s comment:

  1. In this case, it is a bad job of paraphrasing. And it comes to close to a direct quotation. So I failed to understand the writer’s justification of passage being too long. The writer believes it’s a paraphrase, there’s too much material that has been used directly from the source to count as genuine paraphrase. So there’s another thing that looks as if we need to be teaching what counts as paraphrase, how much change does one need to introduce to become a paraphrase. This does not count as a paraphrase. It’s a poor job of quotation. (A professor in Education)

Example 55- Graduate education student

Graduate Students, Social Sciences Leave a comment

A graduate student in language education

Source text:

This finding suggests that L-S was common to HP and LP participants, and it might have facilitated their writing processes while they were composing. … As the present analyses suggest, the HP learners appeared to benefit extensively from switching to their L1 for rhetorical choices and discourse. … On the other hand, the LP learners’ L-S seemed to provide opportunities for them to generate content and review their texts

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Example 38- Graduate science student

Graduate Students, Hard Sciences, Leave a comment

A graduate student from biomedical engineering

Source text:

“Faster runners maintained higher stride rates and lengths throughout the race and made greater use of a non-RFS pattern at the end of the race compared with the slower finishers.” – (abstract)

Source:

Kasmer ME, Wren JJ, Hoffman MD. Foot strike pattern and gaits changes during a 161-km ultramarathon. J Strength Cond Res. 2013. doi:10.1519/JSC.0000000000000282.

Writer’s text:

Commercially, GA is also offered as an assessment tool of athletic performance by identifying locomotive inefficiencies1 (p.1)

Writer’s comment:

I got it from PubMed. Kasmer. So these papers are usually searched through our database PubMed. So the conclusion of the study was “Faster runners …”, so I am basically just generalizing it by saying it is used to assess “locomotive inefficiencies”… So in this case the topic is specific about marathon runners but I am generalizing to become athletic performance because that’s too detailed for the context that I present for the readers. So for that particular reference that [it is]  generalized the entire study in one sentence, just to provide an example to support what I am saying… Again to generalize it. … they are talking about “foot strike patterns” and I’ve changed it to inefficiencies.

Example 37- Graduate science student

Graduate Students, Hard Sciences, Leave a comment

An graduate student in electronic engineering

Source text:

Initial studies show that, in principle, variable speed wind turbines can provide a greater inertia effect than conventional synchronous machines, because generator torque can be increased at will, extracting relatively large amounts of energy from the spinning wind turbine rotor. This decelerates the wind turbine rotor rapidly, and so may not be sustained for very long before aerodynamic torque is reduced. High generator torque also results in high loads on the drive train, which may add significant cost.

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Example 33- Graduate art student

Graduate Students, Social Sciences Leave a comment

An graduate student in gender studies

Source text :

Our study found that casual workers (often women) had least access to rights enshrined in codes of labour practice or to their legal entitlements, and were rarely unionised or represented on workers committees. (722)

Source:

Barrientos, S and S. Smith. (2007) “Do Workers Benefit from Ethical Trade? Assessing Codes of Labour Practice in Global Production Systems”. Third World Quarterly 28(4): 713-729.

Writer’s text:

In their study on labor codes in the agrifood industry, Barrientos and Smith found that labor codes were particularly weak “in terms of workers’ right to organize and bargain collectively, and in relation to gender issues” (2007, p.715). Women suffered not only directly due to their gendered position in patriarchal systems, but also indirectly, as they were most likely to be casual workers and as such, had least access to rights, legal representation or entitlements.

Writer’s comment:

I used “casual workers”, “rights”, “entitlement”. … It says “legal entitlement” and “were rarely unionized or represented”. So I have taken “represented” from her and mixed it with “legal entitlement” to say “legal representation or entitlement”. Because it’s past tense, it means it is in relation to the study.

Example 25- Undergraduate science student

Hard Sciences, Undergraduate Students Leave a comment

Source text:

It used to be only five to ten percent of people developed allergic reactions to antibiotics, mainly penicillin. Now, as more and more individuals are exposed to antibiotics more and more often, increasing number of people are developing allergic reactions to drugs.

Source:

Harris, Malcolm. Pharmaceutical Microbiology. London: Baillière, Tindall and Cox, 1964.

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Example 24 – Undergraduate science student

Hard Sciences, Undergraduate Students, One Comment

Source text:

The Goluszek court was confronted with a male plaintiff who had never been married and had never lived anywhere but in his mother’s home. Goluszek was surrounded by makes in his work environment and the men constantly teased him about not having a girlfriend and not engaging in sexual activities. They periodically showed him pictures of nude women, told him they would arrange sex for him, accused him of being gay or bisexual and made other sex-related comments. Virtually nothing was done when Goluszek reported this activity to his supervisors. In fact, they joined in the fray.

Source: 

Bennett-Alexander, Dawn D. “same-gender harassment: The Supreme Court allows coverage under Title VII.” Labor Law Journal 49. 4 (1998): 928-937.

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