How can Emotional Bonds Vanish? By death? NO!!!!

The book we read this week is The Shrouded Woman, written by Maria Luisa Bombal. I used to think death is the end, that everything stops when a person dies. But from this book, I feel how an individual is constructed through a network of emotional bonds that may or may not vanish after they pass away.

As guided by the lecture video this week, I would like to write about the relationship between Antonio and Ana Maria in this blog. Through the author’s depiction, we see the differences between women and men at that (fictional) time.

Firstly, their identities under patriarchy are different.

In the book, the author describes that there is “a road her father permitted him to use,” which made it “easy for him to spy on her,” and that “he did not even need to get off his horse” [217]. It reveals how Ana María is manipulated through patriarchal authority shared between her father and Antonio.

This also shows that their initial attitudes toward marriage are different. While peeking through the window, Antonio was “already hopelessly in love,” as she is depicted as very pretty in the previous text [218]. However, Ana describes her bridal chamber as “cold” [218] and constantly feels “sad” [222] at the beginning of the marriage.

However, as time goes on, she starts to feel that “she needed his warmth, his embrace, all the encumbering love she had repudiated” [223]. But Antonio starts to become absent, which increases “her repentance, her thirst for love” even more [224].

She wants to see him badly. So when she runs to him, she has not even “rearranged her tousled hair, her tired face,” which causes Antonio to push her away when she hugs him [224]. After she falls in love with him, Antonio never shows his love to her anymore. Nothing can bring him back, not even her first child.

From these pages, I see the differences between women and men. As women are controlled by patriarchy, the only option left to them is to love their husbands while staying graceful and beautiful. Their husbands, however, see them as trophies. They love pretty appearances and are willing to showcase affection and love for those, but these feelings are not long-lasting. Unlike women, who are obligated to stay at home all the time, men can have a “life of gallantry” outside of marriage.

These differences all contribute to the hatred Ana has. I think her hatred consists of her attitudes not only toward Antonio but also toward patriarchy, which may vanish if women were also allowed to have lovers outside of marriage.

The question I have for this week is: After reading this book, how do we think of death?