Tag: social skills

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1.4 Social and Emotional Development: Social Skills

Social Skills

Atypical social skills1 refer to those behaviours that indicate that children are having difficulty relating to others and that may place them or others at risk in terms of safety. Children who display atypical behaviors and/or symptoms in the development of their social skills should be referred to the appropriate specialists as early as possible. Atypical social skills can be indicators of serious developmental difficulties in childhood, for example, children who hurt pets and other animals. These actions are not the same as “acting out” or when children are “going through a phase” as can sometimes happen when major changes at home happen, like death in the family or parents’ divorces. For children who consistently have these kinds of difficulties, it is recommended  that parents pay attention to them and find professional help, rather than wait for children “outgrow” these behaviours.

Some social indicators of atypical social behaviours include:

  • A child showing little or no affect since the very early stages

Some indicators that appear in the preschool years and onwards:

  • Always using the same tone (“monotone”) when speaking;
  • Destroying  toys and other objects and property;
  • Being physically aggressive towards other children and adults;
  • Being verbally aggressive towards others;
  • Hurting animals;
  • Avoiding eye contact to caregivers, friends and strangers;
  • Acting scared or panicking when someone moves quickly;
  • Being overly clingy to others at all times;
  • Showing same level of affection to caregivers and strangers;
  • Lying most of the time;
  • Running away from home or school.
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1.5 Communication Development: Overview

Communication Development

A Brief Overview1

Being aware of language and communication milestones is important for parents and other caregivers.  We often hear statements like the ones listed below from parents whose children are not speaking “like other children”, or from professionals, including family physicians:

  • “My two year-old has yet to utter her first words, but since her pediatrician is not concerned, I guess I should not think about this too much.
  • My three year-old only uses one-word phrases, but so did his father. I guess this runs in my husband’s family and I should not be worried.
  • Leave your child alone. She will talk when she is good and ready. You are ‘making a mountain out of a mole hill’ (exaggerating).”

Nevertheless, the speech and language patterns of these children seem to be different than those of others their age. These differences show both in the way they talk, or the quality of their expression, and in quantity, or how many words they know and can put together into sentences.

It may be that some physicians are not aware of the early signs of speech and language delay in young children. They may want to avoid worry for parents so they reassure parents that their children will develop language at their own pace.

It is also true that some children talk earlier than others. These children usually fall within the typical range of speech and language development. At the same time, a parent’s concerns about their child’s speech and language development are always valid and need to be heard.  Parents need to consult with a public health nurse or a speech and language pathologist.

Signs of severe delay include:

  • Not talking at three years of age;
  • Speaking in only one word phrases at five years of age;
  • Not speaking clearly (e.g., having severe speech difficulties at seven years of age).

Resources:

Click here for a list of different speech, language and communication disorders.

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1.5 Communication Development: Pragmatics

Pragmatics

Language experts use the term “pragmatic language”1 to refer to how we use language for social reasons. That is, when we use language to communicate our thoughts and ideas to those around us – and is not simply making sounds.

Some children may not know how to use language socially. Some signs of pragmatic language difficulties may include:

  • Having little or no turn-taking skills;
  • Getting very close to others when speaking, almost face to face;
  • Having little or no eye contact with others, not even caregivers, siblings or peers when communicating with them (unless dictated by one’s culture);
  • Finding it difficult to understand and answer questions after age 6;
  • Not taking turns when speaking, as if speaking in ‘circles’ after age 3;
  • Giving brief and short answers to all questions, after age 5;
  • Jumping from one topic in a conversation to another with no transition;
  • Not keeping up with the topic of the conversation, or “going off on tangents”.

Children who cannot make their language “work” for them in these ways find this very frustrating. They will need as much professional support as children who cannot understand or speak, or with receptive or expressive language delays.

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