We can often be our own worst critics. Have you ever thought to yourself: “I don’t know what I’m doing”; “You are going to fail”; or “I made a mistake; I might as well just quit now.” Most of us can be hard on ourselves. Yet, berating ourselves does little to alleviate any pain or suffering we may experience in moments that are hard. So, what can we do in these moments instead? Practice self-compassion!
What is self-compassion? Leading expert on self-compassion, Kristin Neff, defines it as “… simply the process of turning compassion inward. We are kind and understanding rather than harshly self-critical when we fail, make mistakes or feel inadequate.” According to Neff, there are three components to self-compassion:
- Self-kindness: Being kind and understanding with oneself as one would be with a friend.
- Common humanity: Acknowledging that suffering, making mistakes and failing are part of the shared human experience.
- Mindfulness: Being mindful of one’s thoughts and feelings without judgment and without over-identifying with them.
To learn more about self-compassion and its three components from Neff herself, watch these short videos.
Research indicates that self-compassion is strongly linked to a greater sense of well-being, decreased stress, and can lead to increased productivity. Self-compassion has also been found to be a source of coping and resilience during hard times. What can you do to get started? Try one of these self-compassion guided practices or exercises today!
Take good care of you,
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