To: Rodrigo Samayoa, ENGL 301 Student Writer
From: Amina Moustaqim-Barrette, ENGL 301 Student Reviewer
Date: December 10th, 2020
Subject: Peer review of your Formal Report: Recommendations on Improving community engagement at the Rockfish Climbing Co-op
Hello Rodrigo,
Thank you for submitting your formal report “Recommendations on Improving community engagement at the Rockfish Climbing Co-op”. The report was a pleasure to read, and I thoroughly enjoyed learning about how a co-operative model has been applied to climbing, and about the unique challenges facing the Rockfish Climbing Co-op. Please find a few comments and suggestions included below for incorporation before final report submission:
Initial impressions:
This proposal is very well organised, and provides a clear explanation of the subject, problem, and potential solutions. It is clear from reading the proposal that you are deeply invested in the co-operative and its success.
Organisation:
- This assignment is well laid-out and designed, with high quality writing.
- The headings used made the document flow and easy to follow, and the language used throughout the assignment was appropriate and accessible to readers.
- Great logical flow throughout the report, which provides an interesting narrative from problem statement to proposed recommendations
Expression:
- Overall, the writing has a professional tone and is of very high quality, as well as being clear and concise
- Style flows well and is very pleasant to read; reflects a professional, positive, and YOU attitude throughout
Content:
- The main portions of the final report are included, including a title page, table of contents, introduction, findings, and recommendations
- To be included in the final draft: Letter of transmission, abstract, appendix, and works cited list
- The author could expand on the methods used. For example, a methods subtitle could be added listing what format and length of interviews, as well as how information was recorded, transcribed, and summarised
- Overall, a very clear report which lays out the issue and provides actionable items
Visuals
- The requisite three visuals are missing from the report and should be added in the final report draft
- Though I am sure you are planning for this in your final report draft, the use of more colours and images would help the visual appeal of the report
Works Cited List
- References are included throughout as comments; these will need to be transformed into in-text citations using MLA formatting
- Works cited list should be included using MLA formatting
Grammar and Typos:
- There are very few spelling mistakes or typos; all suggestions on wording have more to do with personal preference and writing style
Suggestions:
Introduction and Background
- A great introduction and background. One suggestion would be to add a subtitle in this section so that the reader can more clearly delineate where you talk about the purpose of the report. For example, ‘Purpose of the report’ can be used as a subtitle right above the paragraph beginning with “This report will detail actionable recommendations the co-op board and members can take to increase community engagement and recruit new members to the co-op”
Findings
- Really great and informative interviews, information was well structured and organised, with only the most relevant interview content presented
- One suggestion would be to check confidentiality procedures around including interviewee names in the report
Recommendations
- Carefully considered and feasible recommendations
- Numbering helps the flow of the report and provides a clear trajectory for the organisation to follow
Concluding thoughts:
Overall, this report was concise, well-written, and provided an actionable plan for the Rockfish Climbing Co-op. I hope my recommendations will be useful to you as you edit and submit your final report. Do not hesitate to contact me over the blog or at my email (aminamoustaqim377@gmail.com) if you have any questions or need clarification.
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