Peer Review of Application Package

To: Shuge Luo, ENGL 301 student

From: Enguang Shi, ENGL301 student

Date: December 15,2020

Subject: Peer Review of Application Package

Thank you for submitting your application package. The following is my review of your application package, I hope it can be helpful for your modification.

 

First Impression:

This application package is very well written. The resume is very detailed and looks professional. The cover letter and the three letters for acquiring reference were written in a respectful, polite, and professional way.

The format of all documents is very good, and the organization of the application package is very easy to follow. The application package is informative, including all necessary information. Please review the comments below:

 

The Advertisement or Application Instructions

1. The source of the ad is not included in this section. Please cite this website in MLA documentation.

 

Cover Letter

1. This cover letter is quite informative because it covers all the related experiences that might attract the employer. Also, each part of this cover letter connects with one another really well. Good work!
2. Big chunks of text should be avoided. You could instead separate it into sections to make it looks better.
3. There should be a “the” before “University of British Columbia”
4. There should not be an “a” before “project experience” because “experience” is noncountable.
5. There should not be a “for” after “arrange”.

 

Resume

1. You did a good job on your Resume because it looks clear and concise and it also includes all the necessary information on one single page.
2. The “Ball Control” project you did could be extended a bit more in terms of the programming techniques you used.

 

Three Letters Requesting Reference

1. All three letters are written in a proper manner and a clearly demarcated structure. Great works!
2. There should be commas after each “Dear someone”.
3. All three letters are requesting references from instructors. You could consider increasing the diversity of your sources of reference if it’s possible.

 

Conclusion :

Generally, you did an excellent job with your application package! It is both informative and well-organized except for some minor errors. Hope my suggestions will be helpful when writing the final application draft. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to contact me at samuelshi20@outlook.com

Best Regards,

Enguang Shi