MEMORANDUM
To: Elton Kok, Team Undefined Member
From: Richard Chen, Team Undefined Member
Date: November 23, 2020
Subject: Peer Review of Memo to Evan Crisp
Well done on completing the memorandum for Evan Crisp regarding professional email communication. The recommendations laid out in the memo captures the key essence for communicating with a respected individual in a formal tone. Please see the below for a review of the memorandum to Evan.
First Impressions
The memorandum was written concisely, but with enough detail to provide Evan with the direction needed to apply the tips in his future communications. It also provides that advice in a friendly way, avoiding condescension by eliminating most imperatives and the pronoun “you” in the body of the memo.
Writing Style
The memo to Evan made good use of ‘ing’ verbs, avoiding outright commands in most situations that may alienate readers like Evan. The recommendations were also structured nicely in the order of how an email would be written (starting with a greeting and moving into the introduction). In reference to the fourth bullet point, while the sentence started without the use of imperatives, it was followed by some imperatives shortly afterwards, i.e. ‘Try’ and ‘Avoid’. Starting the recommendation without imperatives is important, but maintaining that throughout the sentence is equally as important.
While the memo mostly adheres to the core principles of “Writing with YOU-Attitude”, a strict application of the principles can make the writing feel too rigid. Introducing or concluding the memo with the pronoun “you” is acceptable if used to build goodwill and bridge the gap between writer and reader.
Grammar
No grammatical issues were noted in the writing.
Concluding Remarks
Overall, the memorandum was well written and employed many “YOU-Attitude” techniques that help combat accusatory language. If you have any questions regarding the feedback provided, please contact me by email at richard.chen@ualberta.ca.
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