To: Eric Zhang, Team Member of Team Connect4
From: Hansol Yang, Team Member of Team Connect4
Date: February 4th, 2022
Subject: Peer Review of Definitions (Term: “bug”)
Thank you for introducing the term “bug.” It was an interesting explanation. Please read my review and suggestions below for revising the definitions.
First Impressions
The overall document is very well-organized writing that makes the reading easier, containing all the requirements with the correct form of citations. There might need a few revisions, but it is still good enough for enjoyable reading.
Situation
– The situation described in the document is easily related to readers since the situation is commonly encountered while using computer programs.
– Writing the situation in detail can be a way of improving the flow of the explanation. For example, by writing that “The situation is explaining the term for the customers using my company’s product who had a problem using it by the bug,” the readers can expect to read about the operating principle.
Organization
– The overall document is well-organized, with proper subtitles and clear descriptions of the parenthetical definition and the sentence definition.
– The introduction is very clear and easy to understand the purpose of the document.
– The overall explanations are organized in a way that arouses readers’ interest. For example, showing the origin of the term first makes the term familiar.
– Introducing the related term that originated from the term ‘bug’ helps to understand what it is and explains the expanded definition well.
– The subtitle “Expanded Definition:” is the only subtitle that has a colon(:). If you erase the colon, the document will be more unified.
– In the expanded definition, the visuals need more explanation, and the analysis of parts should be categorized and numbered. For example, the visuals only introduce one type of bug and no other types are mentioned. Providing different types of visualization for different types of bugs will be helpful.
– It might be better if there is a conclusion for the prospective readers.
Expression
– The overall expression is very clear and easy to understand, with an even tone and professional manner.
– Along with the parenthetical definition, the sentence definition explains the term in a precise and brief tone.
– Some phrases need a little more explanation. For example:
– “Interface bugs happen when the language, program, and system are incompatible.”
It seems that readers especially those who are not professionals in the computer science field may not know what is “incompatible” in this field.
Content
The document includes the contents as below:
– Introduction for the assignment
– three types of definitions (parenthetical definition, sentence definition, expanded definition)
– 4 types of expanded definitions are introduced in the textbook (etymology, visuals, operating principle, analysis of parts)
– visual
– reference list
These contents contain all the requirements for the assignment, following the guideline of the textbook correctly.
Visuals
– The visual is properly used, corresponding with the text well and clarifying the explanation.
– The visual has a correct label with the right numbering, but the caption seems too big, as big as the subtitles. It will be better to read if the font size is a little smaller.
– It seems that the figure was borrowed, not from your own source, so there should be a proper source of the visual.
Citation
– The reference list keeps the reference guideline of the assignment: three outer sources with the correct APA style.
– The reference list is impressive, from three totally different web pages, showing your efforts in the research.
– If there are in-cite citations, it will be better to figure out which explanations are from the external sources.
Grammar and Typos
– There are some minor grammar errors, especially on the verbs. For example:
– “It is a process of locating the program bug and use methods or programing tools to correct these errors.”
There needs a correction to unite the form of verbs.
– There are no noticeable typos. All the words are written correctly.
Concluding Comments
The document is very impressive. The organization and expressions are clear, and the explanations are detailed in various ways so which makes the reading enjoyable. If some minor points are revised, it will be very helpful for the prospective readers.
– Adding some details in explanations and the situation
– Checking for the subtitles to be in a unified form
– Checking for the in-cite citations for the explanations from outer sources and the visual
– Considering some parts to be more organized
– Including an ending part
– Checking for some grammar errors, especially for the verbs
It was very pleasant to read your definitions, and hope this review to be helpful for your revision and future writing works. Please feel free to ask any questions if necessary. Thank you for the work.
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