Revised Peer Review of Anna’s Formal Report Draft

To: Anna Li

From: Carol Li

Date: March 19,2022

Peer Review: Formal Report Draft – Improving Gender Disparity in Department of Computer Science in UBC

 

Thank you for completing and submitting a draft of this official report analyzing the feasibility of improving gender disparities in computer science majors at UBC. The report is a great read, with a clear structure and unique original ideas. Below are some suggestions for further improving the draft official report.

 

First Impressions

A major strength of this proposal is the capture of gender disparities in the Department of Computer Science at UBC and useful advice for improving it. Through well-organized data collection and REU-related comparison, the proposed recommendations help the healthy development of this major.

  • One overall area of improvement would be to re-organize the three reasons for the low enrolment rate of female CS students and combine them into 2 paragraphs.
  • Moreover, it’s highly recommended to add the content of the data survey for the UBC section, which enriches the database and keeps consistency.

 

Content

  • Introduction

         Definition of gender disparity

This section illustrates the disparity in the proportion of men and women in university education, especially in mathematics and computer science, based on statistics from the Bureau of Statistics.

 

         Background on gender disparity for the computer science major in UBC

This part builds on the previous part and further shows that the current situation where computer science and software engineering majors are dominated by men also exists at UBC through statistical data over the past 20 years.

 

         Purpose of this report

The purpose of this report is primarily to bridge the gender gap in UBC computer science majors with clarity and simplicity.

 

         Brief description of the data sources

The research methods are clearly explained and the main data sources are listed thoroughly.

 

         Scope of this inquiry 

The scope of the investigation is comprehensive and the main issues to be addressed by the report are identified.

 

  • Collected Data

         Factors that contribute to the low enrolment rate of female computer science students

“1. Historic reason” and “2. Different perceptions towards the computer science major between male and female” can be traced back to the stereotype of “women returning to the family” and the influence of public opinion, which can be combined into one point. And these two points are the reasons for the low proportion of women in computer science in the social context.

 

         Information accessibility in UBC

This part is the main part of the article, which analyzes the low number of women studying computer science at UBC due to the lack of resources and limited access to program information. It is recommended that more survey data be fully analyzed and expressed in this part according to the content of the questionnaire.

 

         Study on measurements

         Research on the past measurements taken in universities

This section introduces a series of practices and important achievements of the REU project on women’s participation in computer science and engineering.

 

          Evaluate the most effective measurement

According to the survey results, holding workshops, running a mentorship program, and recruiting more female mentors are all good ways to improve the gender gap in UBC’s computer science field.

 

  • Conclusion

         Summary and overall interpretation of findings

This section summarizes the report’s findings in comprehensive, concise language.

 

         Recommendations

Combining relevant research and findings, this section explains the solutions in detail, and it is logical and well-founded.

 

Organization

  • Headings are clearly set and bold, effectively separating different sections and subsections.
  • The page number is not marked. According to the MLA format, it is recommended to mark the page number in the upper right corner.
  • The report’s title and subtitles clearly summarize the content of the section.
  • The report has good fluency; every part is connected together in a logical way.
  • The pictures and texts are properly interspersed, and easy to read.
  • For examples and more information, see page 516 in the textbook.

 

Style

The language of the whole report is objective and positive, which effectively reflects the current low proportion of women in computer science at UBC and provides feasible solutions.

 

Brevity, Grammar, and Word Choice

The report is well written and easy to understand, so there are no problems with word choice and grammar.

There are some small typos in the report that can be fixed.

  • E.g.: on page 2 there’s a missing space between “E.” and “Scope”, on the beginning of page 3 there’s also a missing space between “I.” and “Introduction”.
  • The first paragraph of the “Brief description of the data sources” section “… and look for recommendations suggestions from students on gender disparity issue” should be modified as “… and look for recommendation’s suggestions from students on the gender disparity issue”
  • The first paragraph of the “Evaluate the most effective measurement” section “…, while also more than 40 percent of surveyee suggests that Improve supporting network, …” should be modified as “…, while also more than 40 percent of surveyed suggests that improve supporting network, …”

 

Design

  • The font size is good, and the text is double-spaced throughout the report.
  • The images are in the right size, correctly, and effectively labelled.
  • It is suggested that the survey data can be displayed in a variety of graphics. Such as Figure 3, it will be more visually effective to use a fan chart to represent various proportions.

 

Summary

The report clearly clarifies the current low proportion of women in computer science at UBC, analyzes the reasons for this phenomenon in detail, and comes up with suggestions and solutions. For the final version of this report, I would like to make the following recommendations:

  • Combine the three reasons for the “factors that contribute to the low enrolment rate of female computer science students” section into two.
  • Add the content of the data survey for the UBC section.
  • The data survey results are presented in different graphs.
  • Double-check the paragraphs, add page numbers, and correct typos.

 

If you have any questions about any of the comments and suggestions listed above, please feel free to ask. I can be contacted at carol20@student.ubc.ca and I look forward to reading your revision report.

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