To Dale Miller, ENGL 301 Student
From: Harvey Dhaliwal, ENGL 301 Student
Peer Review: Proposal for Determining the New Office Plan for OP Media Group
First Impressions: Thank you for your excellent work on the project proposal. The topic is interesting, and your findings will certainly help management find a good solution to the dilemma at hand.
Organization and Layout:
- Excellent use of headings to organize ideas
- Content is specific to each heading, while remaining cohesive to the proposal as a whole
Introduction:
- Provides helpful context regarding the main cause of the problem (COVID changes)
- Background information on company structure helps in assessing the scale of the problem and feasibility of solutions
- Some additional information on the current hybrid work model would be helpful
- Who decides who will work in the office or from home?
- Do the same eight people visit the office each day, or is there a rotation?
Statement of Problem and Audience:
- Problem and available options are clearly stated
- More clarification on issues with the current system would benefit the reader
- What are the reasons that OP Media is considering different options rather than simply renewing their lease and continuing their hybrid model?
- If available, anecdotal information from employees or management regarding issues with the current system would reinforce the need for change
- Audience for the proposal is appropriate, and their ability to act on proposed suggestions is clear
Proposed Solution:
- Possible solution appears informed and logical
- Outlining the specific benefits of the proposed solution is helpful
Scope:
- Excellent questions which should make for an informative and detailed report
- Asking how the work environment impacts employee safety/productivity/satisfaction may be more useful
- Questions one and three appear similar, can they be combined?
Methods
- Obtaining information from multiple levels of the company (staff, management) is a great plan, and will create a balanced report
- More clarification on the satisfaction survey would be helpful
- Does it poll satisfaction with the current system, attitudes towards possible changes, or both?
- How will specific employees be selected for consultation to avoid biases?
- Excellent proposed use of secondary sources; can provide reliable evidence to support suggestions
Qualifications and Conclusion:
- Strong familiarity and connection to the company is evident
- Conclusion concisely summarizes the entire proposal and its intended purpose
Style/Grammar/Typos
- Paragraph 2, line 1: fulltime should be full-time or full time
- Paragraph 3, line 3: can be edited for conciseness by avoiding repetition of “staff”
- Paragraph 4 and Paragraph 5, line 2-4: single sentence can be broken up into two or reworded to separate ideas and enhance clarity
Concluding Comments:
The proposal is well organized and informative. There is clear thought and effort put into the details of the proposal, and the final project should be useful and informative. Considering the following points would help improve the proposal and project further:
- Adding additional information on the current hybrid model and associated issues
- Combining and revising some of the scope questions
- Editing sentence structure for increased clarity
I look forward to reading your completed project, please let me know if you have any questions.
https://blogs.ubc.ca/engl30198a2022s12/2022/06/22/dales-research-proposal/
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