Peer Review of Dale’s formal draft

To: Dale Miller
From: David Cheung
Date: July 27, 2022

Subject: Peer Review of Dale’s formal draft

Good job with regards to this formal report draft. The draft provides a concise evaluation of the question of whether OP Media group should keep its current office in some form, move into another office or become a fully remote business. Please consider the following suggestions for improving the final version of the report.

Initial Impressions:

The draft is well organized and details the cost and benefits of OP Media’s options for having an office or going full remote. The draft contains all the sections required for this assignment. However, there are some areas that need improvement. The draft needs to address certain points that cause confusion for the reader.

Content:

The information given during the introduction and results section were the most informative sections. The report identifies and analyzes a problem and recommends four possible options including OP Media staying in its current office as is, or in a smaller version of the current office, or move to another office, or forego an office altogether. The results of the survey were also informative and add to analysis of the problem at hand.

Although the above sections are informative, the sections need to be lengthened to meet the requirements of the assignment. The report is logically laid out with sections that make sense for the report. Although most of the report is geared towards the reader, the reader probably already knows what is mentioned in parts of the intro. These parts can be cut or shortened.

Organization:

The organization of the draft is clear and effective with headings and page numbers. The text is also written in short paragraphs. Some of the figures listed may confuse the reader.

• OP Media Group is currently renting a 3,000 square foot office space at 1166 Alberni Street at a cost of $12,000 per month, or $720,000.
  • Though it can be assumed that the highlighted figure is per annum, stating that it is per annum would increase readability

Style:

The tone of the report is objective, positive, and reflects the “you-attitude” towards the reader emphasized in Technical Communication

There are parts of the draft which are wordy

• seek to get a space with reduced capacity
  • “to get” is redundant in this sentence

Design:

The graphs provided help visualize the survey results. Overall, the report draft is reader-friendly and visually appealing. Adding a space between paragraphs my increase the readability of this document.

Conclusion:

This section provides well-thought-out solutions on whether OP Media should move or stay in its current, albeit smaller, office.

Feel free to ask me any questions