Peer Review of Benson’s Formal Report Draft

Peer Review for: Benson Lin, ENGL 301 student

Reviewer: Dennis Deng, ENGL 301 student

Date: Jul 29th, 2022

Subject: Peer Review on Formal Report Draft: Feasibility Analysis for the AMS to Create a Newsletter for Improving Awareness of Library Resources for Career Opportunities for UBC Students at the Surrey City Centre Library  

 

Dear Benson,

Thank you for the opportunity to read your report on analyzing library resource on career opportunityies for UBC students. This report was very well written, as well as a benefit for all UBC students. While there are some minor details that could be improved upon, this was overall a very good report draft. Below, I have outlined some specific suggestions for each of your headings, and some general notes about layout and tone.

 

First Impressions

• The depth of the analysis regarding the Surrey City Centre Library usage for potential career opportunities is impressive.
• The report is written with the interest of the reader, the Student Services Manager. Well done.

 

Introduction

• Great range of background information to provide context as to why our students need to be more aware of useful resources towards future jobs.
• Consider adding a heading/new section to elaborate on why students are not reaching these resources or any insufficient aspects will be useful to the reader to fully grasp the problem.
• Clear scope with interesting wide-ranging guiding questions for the report. And the method of investigation for the report is clear and properly chosen.

 

Data

• The presentation of data collected from observation and surveys is clear and impartial. It effectively informs readers and keeps them on track.
• The first survey question presented, “when invited to an interview, UBC students are…..” seems to be a bit beyond the scope of this research. Given the purpose of this research being “to improve awareness of Library Resources for Career Opportunities”, condensing the sections on “library resources”, “UBC students and career opportunities” could likely result in a more focused report.
• The analysis of each figure is detailed and insightful, although I think that having a short summary that connects all your previous findings together at the of the dissolution section could refresh readers on the core purpose of this report.
• Excellent job incorporating interview and observation results when developing your personal solutions. The sutions address most of the problem.

 

Conclusion

• The Conclusion concisely and accurately encapsulates the findings and interpretation of the report.

 

Organization: The information is structured well in the report with clear segues into each section. An effort has been made to avoid big chunks of text and sub-headings were used wisely. However, Appendix and Reference section might be necessary for the MLA/APA formatted report

Style

• An objective and professional tone is used throughout. Great use of gender-neutral pronounces (i.e. they and their) to introduce UBC students

Design: The graphics are well-designed and correctly labeled. As mentioned before, the choice of representation of data is appropriate and efficient.

 

Overall, it was a pleasure to read your report draft. The whole paper was very interesting and provided a great deal of information, as well as useful recommendations. While minor changes can be made, this is a good first draft. I wish my suggestions will be helpful for you. Feel free to ask me any questions at any time.