Date: February 27, 2023
To: Alethea Kramer
From: Cheka Duheme
Thank-you for submitting your formal report proposal for “Increasing Opportunities for Casual and Unplanned Interactions Between Team Members” for Lesson 2, Unit 1. It was a pleasure to read. Please check the following suggestions below:
Link To Formal Report Proposal
First Impression
At first glance, the formal report proposal has an organized structure. The organization allows for a smooth and enjoyable reading experience. The introduction provides the context and purpose of the research. Furthermore, the problem and the solution are realistic and achievable in the time-frame required for the assignment.
Organization & Expression
- The writing is succinct.
- The tone is both pleasant and professional.
- The language used is simple enough for any level of reader to understand.
- The bolded headings make the formal report proposal easy to read.
- The six methods of inquiry should be numbered instead of bullet-pointed.
Proposed Problem
- The author states that there is a lack of casual/impromptu workplace interactions occurring within the Digital Services Team.
- The author goes into great depth about the limited opportunities to facilitate casual/impromptu interactions between team members.
Proposed Solution
- The proposed solutions is increase in-person interactions and/or implement digital tools to for impromptu/casual bonding.
- The proposed solutions are clearly-stated in the formal report proposal.
- Details about the proposed solutions could benefit being rewritten for reader clarity.
- Adding a bullet-point to each solution to give detail would be more cohesive.
- Adding bullet-points would give your readership a complete picture of each solution.
Scope of Research
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The six methods of inquiry focus on the work preferences and investigate digital tools that can facilitate interactions.
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The six methods of inquiry should be numbered instead of bullet-pointed.
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The six methods of inquiry are clearly-stated to the audience.
- The six methods of inquiry are appropriate and beneficial in understanding the behaviours and preferences of team members in the department.
Methods of Research
- The primary method of utilizing anonymous surveys is a feasible way to conduct the research for the topic.
- The primary method will be effective managing time and upholding the university’s ethical standards for research.
- The primary method will allow for a fully-developed picture in understanding the behaviours and preferences of team members.
- The author could leverage scholarly research as a secondary resource. Articles that discuss a combination of issues like isolation, work-from-home, or COVID-19.
Grammar and Technical Errors
Minor grammar and technical errors have been found in this submission. Be mindful of issues like punctuation, article usage, and spelling:
- “The manager of The Digital Services team is responsible for decision-making on team activities and organization…”
- “The absence of these interactions can lead to workplace isolation and poor performance, which can prevent personal development and disruption to the team’s productivity…”
- “The survey will be distributed directly to The Digital Services team members and posted to a community of co-op students in the same field who work online…”
A few sentences can be re-written to improve paragraph flow or conciseness:
- “The Digital Services team’s manager is responsible for decision-making on team activities and organization…”
- “I plan to pursue these six areas of inquiry to assess the methods for increasing causal and unplanned professional interactions between team members…”
- “The primary method will be creating and distributing a survey to examine and evaluate online or hybrid workers’ experience…”
Qualifications
- The author is currently on a co-op at Digital Services Team.
- The author’s qualifications are suitable for the research topic.
Concluding Comments
Overall, the formal report proposal was interesting and informative. Here are a few suggestions to improve your formal report proposal:
- Correct the issues with grammar (punctuation, article usage, and spelling).
- Rewording sentences to improve conciseness.
- Rewording sentences to improve the flow of writing.
- Changing six lines of inquiry to a numbered list.
- Consider suggestion with using a secondary resource for research.
Great job on your formal report proposal! Thank-you for taking the time to read this feedback. Please reach out if you would like discuss any of the feedback.
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