Peer Review of Formal Report Draft

To: Tanya Mozafari, English 301 Student Writer

From: Helen Zhou, English 301 Student Reviewer

Date: April 3rd, 2023

Subject: Peer Review of Formal Report Draft: Increasing Available Co-op Positions for UBC Students

Thank you for submitting this proposal for determining the feasibility of Increasing Available Co-op Positions for UBC Students. It was definitely insightful to discover more about the co-op program, including barriers and potential solutions. Please see the following suggestions for further improving this proposal:

First Impressions

The formal report provides a detailed analysis on the feasibility of increasing co-op opportunities for students. There is an objective, professional, and positive tone throughout the report that reflects the You attitude. The style and graphics are visually appealing and properly supports the purpose of the report. Overall, the impact and delivery of this report provides an important perspective and potential solutions on the current issue of co-op opportunities.

Organization

• The proposal is well organized, well-written, and concise. All the headings are bolded and appropriately titled.
• For the headings, conjunctions (such as and, of, to, for, etc.) do not need to be capitalized.

Title Page

• A proper title is used to inform the intended audience about the purpose of the report
• All elements, such as recipient, author, and submission date, are included on the page.
• A running header is used throughout the document.

Table of Contents

• Table of contents includes all headings and sections with page numbers that align.
• Formatting the table of contents using templates from Microsoft word or aligning page numbers would help improve readability and avoid inconsistent spacing and font size.

Introduction

• The introduction successfully outlines the problem and the proposal’s purpose, including background of the problem, important definitions, and current barriers.
• Providing a definition and background for co-op definitely provides a comprehensive understanding and provides a useful connection to the description of barriers.
• The purpose (identifying gaps in the current co-op system and suggest opportunities for improvement to help co-op students succeed in their work placements and beyond graduation) and intended audience (Deborah Buszard) are clearly outlined.
• The description of sources and scope of inquiry are well-written and cover sufficient information regarding student co-op opportunities.
• One suggestion is to divide the description of research into primary and secondary research to clearly identify sources.

Data Section

• The overview of co-op program structure provides supporting details and background of the topic.
• Consider splitting the “Barriers to Landing a Co-Op Placement” section into smaller sub-sections to avoid big chunks of text.
• Additionally, consider adding sub-headings for the “Analysis Of Student Surveys” section to avoid big chunks of text and increase clarity on which survey question is being analyzed.
• Strong visuals were used to support the analysis of student surveys and responses.
• The strategies and feasibility of proposed solution sections were well-written and provided a rational and informative perspective on enhancing the current co-op program.

Grammar and Technical Errors

There are no grammatical errors found in the report.

Conclusion

• Consider adding sub-headings of “Summary and Overall Interpretation of Findings” and “Recommendations for Increasing Available Co-op Positions for UBC Students” to better organize the final summary of research and analyses.
• Overall, the summary of the problem and the proposed recommendations are strong and written concisely in a professional tone.

Works Cited

• Great use of MLA formatting throughout the report

Concluding Comments

Overall, this is an impressive proposal for an important purpose of increasing co-op opportunities for students.  Here is a summary of suggested revisions:

• For the headings, conjunctions (such as and, of, to, for, etc.) do not need to be capitalized.
• Revising sections within the data section by adding sub-headings to avoid big chunks of text.
• Separating the conclusion into a summary of findings and recommendations to increase organization and clarity.

I hope these suggestions are useful for the revision process and with increasing the strength and clarity of the report. Please feel free to contact me at hzhou2@student.ubc.ca if you have any questions or comments.

Tanya’s Formal Report Draft