To: Junelie Guevara, Student Writer
From: Gabriella Generoso, Student Reviewer
Date: April 3, 2023
Subject: Peer Review of Formal Report Draft – Improving the Knowledge of Different Post Secondary Pathways for High School Students
First Impressions
Thank you for submitting this perceptive report draft for improving the knowledge of different post-secondary pathways for high school students. This draft is well-organized and raises some insightful points. Executed with sufficient evidence and a professional tone, this draft delivers valuable and meaningful information.
Content
This draft contains all the required sections for assignment 3.2:
- The introduction started with a description of the problem, straight to the point;
- Description of data sources and survey findings with a list of collected data highlights;
- At least two illustrations with explanation for review and;
- Conclusion of findings for summary and recommendations.
Organization
The draft is clear and efficient, ensuring that the content is easily-digestible for technical and non-technical readers. There are few revisions to consider:
- Under ‘Scope of Inquiry’, the six areas begin with the number II, rather than I.
- The ‘Table of Contents’ does not denote ‘A. Summary of Findings’
Style
The draft is written in a professional and friendly tone, and it exceptionally reflects YOU attitude.
Design
The graphics are well-designed and visually appealing, the graphic resolution might be a bit low, but it is a common technical difficulty from data exportation. Consider the following recommendations:
- Export the data received from the survey into Excel or Google Sheets; then, directly upload the chart onto your document.
- Replace the legend that describes the “Mean” as it can be confused as the X-axis label.
Grammar & Spelling
This draft is professionally written with minimal observable grammatical errors. The content is concise and straightforward, which allows for an easily-digestible report. Consider the following revisions:
- Page 3: “With various options, including university, college, trade apprenticeships…”
- Revise to: “With various options, including university, college, and trade apprenticeships…”
Conclusion
This exceptional draft displays passion and professionalism in order to deliver a pragmatic composition of content. Ensuring that high school students are well-informed about their options should be set at the forefront of many peoples’ priorities, especially parents, counsellors and post-secondary representatives. Therefore, this paper seeks to deliver purposeful and insightful content that is well-supported and evidence-based.
Thank you for your submission for a peer review. Kindly review the revisions. Should you have any questions or concerns, please reach out via email at ggener@student.ubc.ca. I look forward to viewing your progress.
Encl: ENGL 301 Junelie Guevara Formal Report Draft
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