(align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[(text-colour:green)[The Time Traveller's Personal Shopper]
(text-colour:cyan)[^^a Twine game by James Martin^^]
(set:$coordinates to "")(set:$location to "")(set:$meat to "")(set:$wine to "")(set:$icecream to "")
[[Click here to start->Begin Game]] ]
<audio src="timetravelmusic.mp3" autoplay>You have been hired by an eccentric multi-trillionaire to be their personal shopper.
It's your first day on the job, and you have just arrived at your boss' mansion.
(link:"[Ring the doorbell.]")[You ring the doorbell.
The door swings open to reveal a tall figure wearing a simple but tasteful (text-colour:green)[green] robe.
<img src="boss.png">
(text-colour:green)["Oh good, you must be the new hire. I'm so short-staffed I have to answer my own front door these days!"]
(text-colour:green)["I'm on my way out to an important function, I need to to pick these things up before dinner tonight"] they say while handing you a [[hand-written note.]]
]The year is 2745.
This is (text-colour:yellow)[you]:
<img src="you.png">
You recently quit your job because it was intolerable.
Luckily, you have just found (link: "a new job!")[ (set: $location to "Your boss' mansion")(go-to: "a new job!")] <img src="note.jpg" width=80%>
(text-colour:green)["You can use my ''time machine'' to pick everything up. Keys are in the ignition. Any questions?"]
[["Hold on... you said "time machine"‽"]]
[["What do these numbers mean?"]]
[["No."]](set:$Q1 to "yes")(text-colour:yellow)["Hold on... you said "time machine"‽"]
(text-colour:green)["Why yes. I am an eccentric multi-trillionaire in the year 2745, as was established in (text-colour:blue)[[[the exposition->Begin Game]]]. Of course I have a time machine!"]
[[I guess that makes sense...->Any other questions?]](set:$Q2 to "yes")(text-colour:yellow)["What do these numbers mean?"]
(text-colour:green)["I take it you've never used a time machine before, have you? It's pretty simple. Those are the space-time coordinates for each pick-up. Make sure to get those right when you enter them into the time machine, or else you'll probably find yourself floating in outer space.
Also, ''never'' return to any coordinates you have already visited!"]
[[Seems simple enough...->Any other questions?]](text-colour:green)["Excellent! My previous errand-runner already paid for everything in advance, so you'll just be collecting the orders.
Accounts should all be under the name ''Alex Farmark''. But I'm sure they'll figure out who you are from your modern clothes.
The time machine is in the garage.
Oh, and don't forget to use the ''universal translator''!
Good luck!"]
Before you can speak again, (link:"[a private car suddenly pulls up behind you and pops open a door.]")[a private car suddenly pulls up behind you and pops open a door.
Your extremely trusting new boss leaps past you into the passenger seat, and is immediately whisked away. You are left standing in front of the open door to [[their mansion]].]<img src="note.jpg" width=80%>
(text-colour:green)["Any other questions?"]
(if:$Q1 is not "yes")[[["Hold on... you said "time machine"‽"]]]
(if:$Q2 is not "yes")[[["What do these numbers mean?"]]]
[["No."]](unless: (passage:)'s tags contains "no-header")[(text-colour:orange)[^^location: |location>[$location]^^]<hr>]
(set:$coordinates to "pxq37m.483b2c")Once inside, it doesn't take you long to find your way to (link:"[the garage.]")[the garage.
Inside is a sleek metal pod no larger than an old-fashioned refigerator.
You (link:"[approach the pod.]")[approach the pod, and a previously invisible door slides open in response to your proximity.
(link:"[Step inside.]")[Stepping inside, you find a ''universal translator'' that you plug into your nural node behind your ear (isn't living in the twenty-eighth century awesome‽).
In front of you is a simple (set:$location to "the time machine")[[control panel->the time machine]].
]]]|box>[(text-colour:cyan)[Current Coordinates:] [''$coordinates'']]
(text-colour:cyan)[(input-box:bind $coordinates,"XXX=","enter new coordinates here and press GO to execute")]
|box>[(text-colour:green)[[[''GO''->go]]]]
|box>[(text-colour:red)[[[''EMERGENCY RESET''->emergency reset]]]]
[[Check the note.]]
[[Exit the time machine.]](if:$coordinates is 0 OR "enter new coordinates here and press GO to execute" OR "")[Nothing happens. You probably need to [[enter some coordinates first->the time machine]]](else:)[The machine begins to hum and whir.
(if:$coordinates is $location)[(click-goto:?page, "pxq37m.483b2c")](else:)[
(if:$coordinates is "pxq37m.483b2c" or "k3992n.a8v349" or "2htfy3.j6uuzd" or "7verip.fef553" or "cc496t.3428mj" or "b78wh2.x5gyv2" or "zkq88n.ha3cue")[(click-goto:?page, "Here we go...")](else:)[(click-goto:?page, "Here goes nothing...")]
]](set:$location to "Your boss' mansion")
(text-style:"wavy-underline","smear","expand","rumble")[(text-rotate-x:13)+(text-rotate-y:42)+(text-rotate-z:19)[(text-colour:cyan)[TIME TRAVEL IS HAPPENING NOW]]]
(text-style:"fidget")[(text-style:"buoy")[(text-style:"sway")[(text-style:"shudder")[(text-style:"rumble")[<img src="you.png">]]]]]
(click-goto:?page, "return")
<audio src="timetravelmusic.mp3" autoplay><img src="note.jpg" width=80%>
[[Put the note back in your pocket.->the time machine]](if:$location is "Your boss' mansion")[Stepping out of the machine, you look around the garage. There isn't much else to go here, other than get back in [[the time machine]] or [[walk away and quit this job before you've even started.]]](else:)[You have already done what you came here to do. Sticking around much longer might mess up the timeline, right? Who knows how this time travel stuff works. Probably best to get back in [[the time machine]] and get out of here.]
(text-style:"wavy-underline","smear","expand","rumble")[(text-rotate-x:13)+(text-rotate-y:42)+(text-rotate-z:19)[(text-colour:cyan)[TIME TRAVEL IS HAPPENING NOW]]]
(text-style:"fidget")[(text-style:"buoy")[(text-style:"sway")[(text-style:"shudder")[(text-style:"rumble")[<img src="you.png">]]]]]
(if:$coordinates is "pxq37m.483b2c")[(set:$location to "pxq37m.483b2c")(click-goto:?page, "pxq37m.483b2c")]
(if:$coordinates is "k3992n.a8v349")[(set:$location to "k3992n.a8v349")(click-goto:?page, $location)]
(if:$coordinates is "2htfy3.j6uuzd")[(set:$location to "2htfy3.j6uuzd")(click-goto:?page, $location)]
(if:$coordinates is "7verip.fef553")[(set:$location to "7verip.fef553")(click-goto:?page, $location)]
(if:$coordinates is "cc496t.3428mj")[(set:$location to "cc496t.3428mj")(click-goto:?page, $location)]
(if:$coordinates is "b78wh2.x5gyv2")[(set:$location to "b78wh2.x5gyv2")(click-goto:?page, $location)]
(if:$coordinates is "zkq88n.ha3cue")[(set:$location to "zkq88n.ha3cue")(click-goto:?page, $location)](click-goto:?page, $location)
<audio src="timetravelmusic.mp3" autoplay>Before you have the chance to further consider your boss' warning about not trying to travel to coordinates you have already been to, you blink out of existence.
''THE END''
[[Try Again?->Start]]You decide that doing time-travelling errands for an eccentric multi-trillionaire is a little too intense for your liking.
You walk away and find a new job, that isn't nearly as interesting.
''THE END''
[[Try Again?->Start]](set:$location to "???")
(text-style:"wavy-underline","smear","expand","rumble")[(text-rotate-x:13)+(text-rotate-y:42)+(text-rotate-z:19)[(text-colour:cyan)[TIME TRAVEL IS HAPPENING NOW]]]
(text-style:"fidget")[(text-style:"buoy")[(text-style:"sway")[(text-style:"shudder")[(text-style:"rumble")[<img src="you.png">]]]]]
(click-goto:?page, "new location")
<audio src="timetravelmusic.mp3" autoplay>The machine quiets down and (link:"[the door slides open.]")[the door slides open.
You are in your boss' garage.
(link:"[You hear a doorbell ring.]")[You hear a doorbell ring.
You exit the garage and (link:"[wander down the hallway towards the front door...]")[wander down the hallway...
... (link:"[to see yourself staring back at you from the open front door.]")[to see yourself staring back at you from the open front door.
=|=
<img src="you.png">
=|=
<img src="boss.png">
=|=
=|=
=|=
=|=
<img src="you.png">
|==|
Your boss turns away from //other-you// to look back at ''you'', and (link:"[rolls their eyes.]")[rolls their eyes.
(text-colour:green)["(text-style:"smear")[//sigh//]... I guess you messed up, and ''//you//''-"] turning back to //other-you// at the door, (text-colour:green)["- are going to make me late because I have to show you how to do this myself so you don't make the same mistake again. Or yet? Whatever, come with me."]
(link:"[Before you can think of what to do or say...]")[Before you can think of what to do or say, your boss leads the slightly younger version of yourself to the garage as you stand stunned and frozen in the hallway.
[[You hear the time machine power up...]]
]]]]]] And you blink out of existence.
''THE END''
[[Try Again?->Start]](if:$meat is not "yes")[(set:$meat to "yes")The machine quiets down and (link:"[the door slides open.]")[the door slides open.
You step outside to find yourself at the edge of forested patch that borders a rolling grassland on a cool and cloudy day. (if:$wine is "yes")[The landscape here looks very different than the flat expanses of the vinyard. ](if:$icecream is "yes")[It is immediately apparent that you will not be going indoors to pick up this item, as there is nothing within sight that would qualify as "indoors".]
(text-colour:orange)["Alex!"] a voice calls out.
(link:"[You turn to see...]")[You turn to see a woman waving at you from just behind a nearby hill. She is wearing crude hide garments and holding a bloody cutting tool in her other hand.
<img src="hunter.png">
Your universal translator (text-style:"fidget")[tickles your brain] as she (link:"[speaks,]")[speaks,
(text-colour:orange)["Oh, friend of Alex! You are dressed the same way. You are here at the perfect time, just as was promised. How do you do that? No matter, here is what we owe you!"]
She holds up towards you (link:"[a sack that is dripping and stained red.]")[a sack that is dripping and (text-style:"smear")[(text-colour:red)[stained red]].
As you approach to take the sack, you can see that the other side of the hill had been hiding a freshly hunted ''woolly mammoth''. It looks as if an entire tribe of people is participating in butchering (link:"[the meat.]")[the meat.
(text-colour:orange)["I remembered our side of the bargain. I have filled the bag with the best cuts from the hunt, as was agreed upon."]
You take the sack and thank the woman, and she wishes you luck on your travels.
As you return to the edge of the forest, you realize that the time machine has been perfectly positioned in the trees that it is completely hidden from the hunters' sight.
You take your bag of ''mammoth steaks'' and re-enter [[the time machine]].
]]]]]<audio src="mammoth.mp3" autoplay>](else:)[Before you have the chance to further consider your boss' warning about not trying to travel to coordinates you have already been to, you blink out of existence.
''THE END''
[[Try Again?->Start]]](if:$wine is not "yes")[(set:$wine to "yes")The machine quiets down and (link:"[the door slides open.]")[the door slides open.
You step outside to find yourself standing next to an imposing wall of pinkish stone that forming one wall of a large building that looks something like a cross between a mansion and a castle. The air is hot and the sun is shining brightly in the blue sky. (if:$meat is not "yes")[The landscape here is flat and covered in the orderly rows of green-covered fences typical of a vinyard. ](if:$meat is "yes")[The landscape here looks very different than the hilly grasslands of the mammoth hunting grounds. Instead, here can be seen a flat expanse covered in the orderly rows of green-covered fences typical of a vinyard. ](if:$icecream is "yes")[You wonder why the time machine was programmed to park out in the open here and not hidden inside someplace like it was at the ice cream pickup.]
(text-colour:orange)["Hello, is somebody out there?"] a distant voice calls out from below you. Looking down, you see (link:"[the entrance to a cellar.]")[the entrance to a cellar.
You make your way cautiously down the steps.
(text-colour:yellow)["Hello!"] you call back as your (text-style:"fidget")[brain tickels] from the universal translator, (text-colour:yellow)["I am here to pick up an order for Alex Farmark."]
You reach the bottom of the stairs and see a wine cellar full of barrels, as well as (link:"[a man dressed in a puffy shirt and pants with long socks and a cloak draped over his shoulders.]")[a man dressed in a puffy shirt and pants with long socks, a cloak draped over his shoulders, and a large hat.
<img src="winemaker.png">
(text-colour:orange)["Hmmmm, most of the household is away accompanying the lord's visit with the Duke. Lucky timing finding me while I was down here! Let me check the register."]
He retrieves a leather-bound book from a shelf, then turns an empty barrel on its end to use as a table so he can more easily (link:"[leaf through the pages.]")[leaf through the pages.
(text-colour:orange)["A-ha! Here it is, one miniature barrel for Alex of Farmark. Paid for in full in 1616. Wow! This one is nearly as old as you are, your lord must have a special occasion they've been waiting for to send you for this now.]
The man disappears into the back of the cellar and returns a few minutes later with (link:"[ cask the size of a large watermelon.]")[a cask the size of a large watermelon.
(text-colour:orange)["It's a good thing it's a small one, I have nobody here right now to help you lift anything bigger into your cart."]
You take the cask and thank the man, and he wishes you luck on your travels.
As you exit the cellar and carry the small barrel back into [[the time machine]].
]]]]]<audio src="wine.mp3" autoplay>](else:)[Before you have the chance to further consider your boss' warning about not trying to travel to coordinates you have already been to, you blink out of existence.
''THE END''
[[Try Again?->Start]]](if:$icecream is not "yes")[(set:$icecream to "yes")The machine quiets down and (link:"[the door slides open.]")[the door slides open.
You step outside to find yourself now standing in the middle of a dark, unfurnished room with grey carpet and off-white walls that are entirely blank save for a few odd nail-holes and the occasional electrical outlet or light switch. There are windows with curtains closed over them, and you can hear rain falling outside. (if:$meat is "yes")[Somehow, this creepy empty house feels less safe than the exposed prehistoric wilderness of the mammoth-hunters. ](if:$wine is "yes")[At least the time machine could be parked inside here, unlike at the château with the vinyard.]
Something behind you (link:"[buzzes and chimes.]")[buzzes and chimes.
On the floor, a small rectangular device, connected to the power outlet in the wall, has lit up the corner of the room with a bright screen. You (link:"[draw nearer...]")[draw nearer to see the words "New Text Message" and "Slide to Unlock" displayed.
You (link:"[drag your finger along the animated slide track...]")[drag your finger along the animated slide track and the screen changes to reveal the new message.
14:23
|box>[Your scheduled Rocky Point Ice Cream delivery will be arriving in approximately 15 minutes. If you are not able to meet our driver to receive this delivery, please reply "9" and we will contact you to arrange a new delivery time. Please note that we will not leave ice cream deliveries unattended.]
You look at the top of the device's screen and notice that the current time displayed is 14:41. (link:"[Did you miss the delivery already??]")[Did you miss the delivery already??
(link:"[There is a knock on the door, and the doorbell rings.]")[There is a knock on the door, and the doorbell rings.
You exit what you assume is normally the living room when it has furniture, and turn the corner to (link:"[unlock and open the door.]")[unlock and open the door, revealing (link:"[a young woman whose work attire is not very well-suited for the current downpour.]")[a young woman whose work attire is not very well-suited for the current downpour.
<img src="icecream.png">
(text-colour:orange)["Hi, here's your ice cream!"] she says, handing you a (link:"[cold, round container.]")[cold, round container with the words "Girl Guide Mint Ice Cream" written on the side.
In the short time that it took you to glance at the writing on the package, the delivery driver is already hopping back into her truck parked outside. You can see clearly now that you are standing inside a small house, one of many that line this concrete-paved street.
You close the door and return to [[the time machine]].
]]]]]]]]]<audio src="icecream.mp3" autoplay>](else:)[Before you have the chance to further consider your boss' warning about not trying to travel to coordinates you have already been to, you blink out of existence.
''THE END''
[[Try Again?->Start]]](set:$location to "Your boss' garage")(if:$icecream and $meat and $wine is "yes")[The machine quiets down and (link:"[the door slides open.]")[the door slides open.
You step outside to see your boss standing in the garage (link:"[waiting for you.]")[waiting for you.
<img src="boss.png">
(text-colour:green)["Welcome back! Let's see here, it seems you have] [[everything from the list...]]"]]](else:)[The machine quiets down and (link:"[the door slides open.]")[the door slides open.
You step outside to see your boss standing in the garage (link:"[waiting for you.]")[waiting for you.
(text-colour:green)["Welcome back! Uh-oh, it doesn't look like you have] (link:"[everything from the list...]")[(text-colour:green)[everything from the list...
No matter! Just hit the "Emergency Reset" button. Yes, I know this isn't really an emergency, but it's fine. The button's name is more dramatic than it needs to be, that's all."]
Press the [[emergency reset]] button.
]]]]
''THE END''
You have won the game. Congratulations! 🙂
[[Try Again?->Start]](set:$wine to "yes")
(set:$meat to "yes")
(set:$icecream to "yes")
[[zkq88n.ha3cue]](text-colour:green)["](link:"[A main course of steak from the long-extinct woolly mammoth,]")[(text-colour:green)[''A main course of steak from the long-extinct woolly mammoth,'']
(link:"[some fancy French wine from the middle ages that my snobby friend won't ever shut up about,]")[(text-colour:green)[''some fancy French wine from the middle ages that my snobby friend won't ever shut up about,'']
(link:"[and a very rare and limited edition ice cream from the only year you can get it without risking catching a plague.]")[(text-colour:green)[''and a very rare and limited edition ice cream from the only year you can get it without risking catching a plague.'']
(link:"[Well done!]")[(text-colour:green)[''Well done! Just leave everything there, it will be easier for my chef to get it all that way."'']
As you return the universal translator to its storage place in the time machine, a signal in your nural node alerts you to a new deposit (of a substantial sum!) that has been [[made to your bank account.]]
]]]](text-colour:yellow)["This is quite a luxurious meal,"] you say, (text-colour:yellow)["what's the special occasion tonight?"]
Your new boss (link:"[laughs.]")[laughs.
(text-colour:green)["Special occasion‽ Ha! Why, it's Tuesday, that's all."] they reply with a (link:"[smile.]")[smile.
(text-colour:green)["I have a new list ready for you tomorrow, but after that you'll have to start setting up your own procurements. I'm sure you'll get the hang of it in no time!"]
and before you can respond, your boss hops into the time machine and [[disappears with a flash.]]
]]Your heart jumps as (link:"[you feel the floor drop away from under your feet.]")[you feel the floor drop away from under your feet.
(link:"[You are FALLING!]")[You are FALLING!
and (link:"[STILL FALLING!]")[STILL FALLING!
... and then you (link:"[realize...]")[realize...
that you are (link:"[floating]")[floating in (link:"[''outer space.'']")[''outer space.''
You must have entered (link:"[the wrong coordinates!]")[the wrong coordinates!
The time machine (text-style:"rumble")[groans] and (text-style:"shudder")[shudders]. (link:"[It isn't designed to be a space ship!]")[It isn't designed to be a space ship!
(text-style:"shudder")[(text-style:"rumble")[(text-style:"blink")[(text-style:"fidget")[(text-style:"shudder")[
(text-style:"rumble")[You are panicking]]]]]]
there is only enough time to push
|box>[(text-colour:red)[[[''EMERGENCY RESET''->emergency reset]]]]
]]]]]]]](unless: (passage:)'s tags contains "no-footer")[
<hr>^^(text-colour:(hsl:0,0.8039,0.5,0.85))[[[click here to restart game->Start]]]^^]