Recently I have been thinking a lot about privilege. Examining questions such as what is privilege, who has privilege, why do they have privilege, in what ways am I privileged? I find it challenging to step outside of myself and see all the ways that I have power. It can be easy to focus on places where privilege lacks in my life rather than where it is present. Womanhood and gayness color my daily experiences and I’m often aware of how these things impact my daily interactions.

The other day I was walking to the 99 along Commercial and saw a kerfuffle ahead of me. There was a tall, skinny, white, hipster-looking dude yelling at a security guard, “just give me so F@*%ING food! Please!” as he marched past me we made eye contact. His face was red and tears were streaming down his cheeks. His expression haunted me for a lot of the day and brought many of these questions to mind. I am so lucky to not know what being chronically hungry feels like, to be reasonably educated, to have been raised in a relatively loving home, and to have had the opportunities I’ve been privileged with. What can I do with this privilege? Now that I see just how privileged I am I can hopefully help those in need. If I see this man again I have sworn to myself that I will offer him my lunch. Privilege is something we have focused on a lot in this class – mostly in a critical sense. Perhaps we should start looking at where it is present in our own lives and start seeing how we can use it to create and influence positive change.

I’ve been waiting for the day I wake up and realize that I’m all grown up. The more I anticipated this day, the more I realized that adulthood is not a destination you suddenly reach.  I expected some great change when I turned 18, 19, 20, and 21 and still nothing. But this morning I made a huge leap in the direction of grown-up-ness. It is election day and I voted. It was the first time that I have ever cast a ballot and some reason it was a big step for me towards feeling like a proper adult.

I live with some very intelligent and educated people who all have five years of age on me. Last night, we were gathered in our living room discussing the election. I can say truthfully, and somewhat reluctantly, that I have never seriously discussed politics with my own generation. The “adultness”  of the conversation left me somewhat in awe. The political terms and concepts being thrown around were new and caused me to feverishly research all the potential candidates the next morning. My most informing source was from the Georgia Straight found here:
http://www.straight.com/news/769716/straight-slate-2014-municipal-election-suggestions-your-vote. It summarizes the campaigns for candidates and offers some critical comparisons. Granted, it is biased, but nonetheless I found it to be a good starting place to formulate some opinions. My lack of previous political conversations and voting experiences made me question other residents participation. Apparently only 34.6% of residents cast ballots. That is a surprising and disappointing fact. Is democracy really that great if so few people are participating and expressing their voice?

To relate my voting experience back to the course, I index-searched “democracy.” According to Matthew Arnold, the combination of the rise democracy and the aristocracy create a favorable environment for anarchy (pp. 20). To me, this is counter intuitive. Democracy suggests that citizens are actively selecting the government, not being anarchists. Arnold’s suggestion to overcome this anarchy is through culture, education, and coercion. He states that culture and education would remove popular culture (pp. 20). This is ironic given that popular culture has become a source of political and democratic education such as the Georgia Straight was for me when deciding who to vote for. In conclusion, democracy is pretty neat, more people should participate, and I’m happy to say that it helped me feel like a real adult.

I’m taking another class taught by Dr. Stewart, CSIS 300, and one required reading is 50 Shades of Grey. I have tried on three separate occasions to read it but I fail every time. Why? Because I can’t get past the barriers of what I see as heteronormative, patriarchal, and a generally poorly written book. To be fair, I haven’t read more than twenty pages so I acknowledge that I don’t have the full picture. Apparently, not everyone struggles to read it as much as I do. 50 Shades of Grey has sold 15 million copies in the US and Canada, outselling Twilight, which is an impressive accomplishment (http://neomam.com/fifty-shades-of-grey-infographic/).

During our Gender lecture, we looked at Reading Romance in Storey’s Popular Culture. Modleski argues that romance novels mass-produce fantasies and the stories written speak to very real problems and tensions in women’s lives (pp. 142). This novel is prescribing sex and mainstreaming BDSM. Adult products are increasing as 50 Shades of Grey flies off the shelves. Ropes, vibrators, and soft bondage products have all risen in sales – Babeland Adult Toy Store has increased sales by 40%. It would be hard to argue that 50 Shades has not made an impact on people’s sex lives. But what kind of sexual experience is this romantic novel modeling? One of female submission. BDSM can take so many different forms and is complicated and complex sexual world. Many people in the community argue that it decreases the notion of gender and opens up the doors for women empowerment and allows people to take on different, nontraditional roles. I agree that BDSM has the potential to contribute towards a more liberal and equal society. BUT that message is not what is communicated in this best-selling book. It is selling a dominant idea: that women are submissive and men are dominant. It prescribes what BDSM looks like instead of allowing participants to create their own sexual experiences. There are how-to books, guides, and games, all “teaching” us how to mimic the sex illustrated in 50 Shades. To illustrate my struggle with this book I turned to a random page (328) and I quote:

“Hold tight…this is going to be quick, baby.” He grabs my hips and positions himself, and I brace myself for his assault.

Just reading a few lines makes me feel sick. Use of the word, “assault” doesn’t exactly communicate consent and his domination comes across as non-negotiable. If Modleski is right, this book is speaking to real problems in women’s lives: gender inequality. 50 Shades of Grey is mass producing what BDSM sex looks like and I’m very concerned that these fantasies are manifesting in patriarchal, misogynistic, and non-consensual ways.