So I actually wrote this entry on the bus last Monday, but I never got around to posting it on Blog Squad until now.
Over the January 14-16th weekend, I went to the retreat as a member of the BOO Crew (also known as UBC Orientations: squad leaders and O-Team). Although I attended many informative, interactive, and fun workshops, I also got out a lot personally from this retreat. I’m sure that I knew a lot of this already, but instead of reading it in a handout, this realization and life lesson was like an epiphany that hit me like a punching bag near the end of the retreat.
So, Aly, explain. Why is the title of your post “Flirting with role reversal?” For me, I see the act of “flirting” as a temporary mechanism, that this is not meant to last. Maybe the consequences can last over a long period of time, and lead to deeper developments, or will be like sunshine in Vancouver, dropping in every once in a while (just kidding. About the sunshine part. Sometimes. Depending on the year.) For me, I am an extroverted person who can have her quiet moments, but generally, I enjoy meeting new people and bonding with them, like a description of the retreat I heard from a past squad leader of the BOO Crew was “crazy ass bonding”. So it really bothered me when I felt really unlike me during Friday night and on Saturday. I felt like I retreated mentally and bundled my personality into a cave during activities and during conversations with people. I was upset with myself that I was supposed to be bonding with these people, but I felt like I was depriving them an idea of the real me. It wasn’t like I didn’t add my input to projects or bond with people-I did, but not to the extent that I usually do. This bugged me to the point where I had to retreat (haha. pun!) to the “homework cabin” to figure out and reflect why I couldn’t break out of this box that I felt I contained myself in. I was reflecting and kept pondering how “wrong” I thought this behaviour was. I was being too introverted to the point where it was scaring me. But as I did more and more reflection on Sunday afternoon and after a good night’s sleep on Sunday night in my own bed, I realize that practicing role reversal may not be a bad thing after all. I think I knew the answer earlier, likely on Saturday afternoon, but I got so caught up with the activities that I didn’t really have some alone time.
There was this great facilitation game that we played on Saturday afternoon, where we learned about the different roles in a discussion. To have a list of characteristics which define the usual actions of people in a discussion and for us to integrate that list into a game for better active learning was amazing. I had a lot of fun in that activity but never realized the extent that the lesson I would take away from that is that a team needs to comprise of people with different roles. It would be great if everyone contributes to the discussion, but listeners are also very important because sometimes more opinions only cause greater conflicts because of the number of ideas that need to be narrowed down. I realized later that in one of the activities where I didn’t feel like I contributed a lot helped the team, because I was listening to the ideas and letting the experts show and tell us about the physics of the task to help us succeed. When I was listening, I also showed my support for the team and made us better.
When I took a step back at this retreat, I also managed to observe people a lot. I won’t tell you who, but I identified a person who went on the trip as exhibiting behaviours like I am proned to. I watched them and it was like I could see myself, but of course, we’re different people with our own distinct backgrounds. I found out that sometimes, inclusiveness can get to the point of discomfort and people may subconsciously be intimidated or overwhelmed by your personality that they may not be able to show you who they really are. Thus, different people exhibit different behaviours in different environments, and the different elements present-ie: the people, triggers different sides of people.
So, will this period of introversion last? I don’t know. I may get used to feeling a certain way when I’m around this group of people that my behaviour doesn’t change from what they know of as qualities of me. Maybe I’m discovering another side to myself, that as I’m growing up, I’m becoming more introverted. Or, it might just be a phase where my mind and body are teaching me some valuable life lessons about communicating with others and understanding them. Despite the awkwardness I felt at times (sometimes problems just seem to comprise of the bulk of the period where you’re experiencing them, and sometimes in narratives and journals, it is easy to forget the good stuff that happened), I’ve had some fun conversations, singalongs, laughs, and overall bonding with my Orientations team, which include our student leaders, faculty advisors, squad leaders, and more!I’m so happy to have gained such a diverse group of amazing people who make up ths family. You can join too, by applying to be a MUG Leader, Squad Manager, Welcome Team crew, or Eco-Team member at http://www.involvement.ubc.ca/2011/01/14/apply-to-be-an-orientation-leader-for-next-fall/ . Also, I’ve written a lot in my past blog entries about Peer Programs, and the applications are open for that now too! Apply! http://www.involvement.ubc.ca/2011/01/12/peer-programs-recruitment-is-open/
haha. I’m an Arts student. Writing under 1000 words doesn’t usually happen. Anyways, on another note, as I’m actually writing down this entry on the bus, as opposed to thinking about it while brushing my teeth, why are there so many cute, full of character houses being sold for zoning and redevelopment? I’m looking at you, a house on my #480 bus route.
