I feel SUPER strongly about this book. Parting from my usual neutral stance in my usual blogs, today I’ll be sharing my very biased and personal viewpoint on “The Lover” by Marguerite Duras; specifically regarding its commentary on power dynamics and agency within relationships that have significant and inappropriate age gaps.
A. He Has the Power.
I see in many blogs where people have stated that the relationship between young Duras and the man is equal, an interpretation with which I strongly disagree. The novel’s depiction suggests a scenario where the young protagonist believes she possesses power and believes that the man is “at her mercy” (Duras 35), potentially subverting traditional power hierarchies. However, this perception of control is illusory and significantly problematic when examined within the context of how predators operate. In relationships with considerable age disparities, especially those involving minors, the older individual inherently holds more power due to a combination of factors including life experience, emotional maturity, and societal status. The belief of the young girl in her control or dominion over her lover can be seen as a narrative constructed by herself to rationalize or cope with the complexities of the relationship. However, this self-perception doesn’t change the reality of the power dynamics at play. Predators often manipulate their victims into believing they have autonomy and control in the relationship. This manipulation is a tactic that serves to further entrench the power imbalance, making it difficult for the younger individual to recognize the exploitation and abuse. The girl’s belief that she is in control, or her actions within the relationship, can be understood as responses to the manipulative strategies employed by the older man. Her perceived agency then becomes a part of the predatory dynamic, not an indication of genuine power or control!
B. Adding Race: She is Objectified and She Isn’t 100% Aware.
The role of race further introduces a layer of complexity to the power dynamic between the young girl and her older lover. While on the surface, the girl’s whiteness might seem to grant her a form of power or superiority within the colonial context of Southeast Asia, this interpretation fails to capture the nuanced realities of colonial power structures and the way these structures impact interpersonal relationships. Firstly, the term “little white whore” used to describe the young girl serves to exoticize and objectify her. This terminology reflects a colonial gaze that fetishizes her youth and race, placing her in a position of vulnerability rather than empowerment. In a colonial setting, whiteness can indeed confer certain privileges and statuses; however, when coupled with her gender and youth, her race becomes another axis along which she is objectified and commodified. This complicates the notion of racial superiority, as her perceived “power” is undercut by the ways in which she is diminished to an object of desire.
Secondly and I believe most importantly, the older man’s understanding of these racial dynamics signifies a manipulation of the colonial power hierarchies. His awareness doesn’t necessarily mitigate the power his age and experience afford him; rather, it complements it. He understands that within the colonial context, the young girl’s whiteness makes her both desirable and vulnerable, and he leverages this to maintain control over the relationship. His manipulation of the racial dynamics at play reveals a deliberate exploitation of the power imbalances rooted in colonial history and social hierarchies. Moreover, the young girl’s lack of awareness regarding the full implications of her racial identity highlights her naivety and further emphasizes her vulnerability. While she may navigate some aspects of their relationship with a sense of control, her lack of understanding about the interplay of race, colonialism, and power means that any perceived authority she has is limited and ultimately superficial. She is not fully aware of how her identity is constructed and constrained by the colonial context, which limits her ability to wield it in any meaningful way.
C. Conclusion: Warning to Impressionable Readers!
“The Lover” by Marguerite Duras could lead readers to perceive an equal power dynamic in a relationship marred by a significant age gap, thereby glossing over the young protagonist’s vulnerability and potentially glamorizing an exploitative relationship. While not aiming to blame Duras, who is narrating her personal experience that might inherently carry a complex, subjective viewpoint, it’s essential to highlight how such narratives might be misinterpreted by impressionable readers. Misinterpretations could dangerously normalize or even romanticize harmful dynamics, overlooking Duras’s potential critique of colonialism and age-related power imbalances.
D. Questions for Discussion:
Q: Do you believe this relationship is equal? Do you think the young girl actually held any significant power over the man?
Q: How do you interpret the role of racial dynamics in their relationship?
This was a great blog and an interesting read. Before reading I was really against the relationship because of the age gap. But then after watching this week’s lecture I was a bit on the fence about whether their relationship was equal or not. When I was reading I guess I was leaning towards equal because of her confidence and the complexities (race, status, etc) of the relationship. However, after reading your blog I think im gonna go with unequal. There is honestly no getting past the fact that she is so young.
Jennifer, you fundament your argument about the power dynamics very well. I also thought about the illusion of control constantly. I think a lot of the blogs focused on how the society was judgemental about race when it came to the main characters and you brought a new perspective. Well tied in with the colonial power structured and thinking about how he was in a very explicit way commodified her.
Thanks for your comment!
– Tesi
Hi Jennifer! I really liked your blog, I like that you added a little screenshot to back your claims! I respond to your question about the age gap and the power dynamics that it brings, I definitely found that at the beginning of the text, the age gap was something that bothered me a lot. After watching the lecture, I can also see that she does seem to have a significant amount of power in the relationship but that still doesn’t put my mind at ease all that much because of the particular emphasis multiple times throughout the text about her being a child, both mentally and physically. I think that for me was the real part that made me EXTREMELY uncomfortable.