(Please note that this instillation is meant to be listened to on a bench in the UBC rose garden.)
She sits comfortably with her left arm gently caressing the warm black steel of the park bench. She wears loose fitting yoga pants, but they aren’t lulu lemon or Nike or even Adidas … they are a local brand that uses only recycled material, but they hug her slim thighs perfectly. Her sandals are comfortable and her lose fitting shirt hugs her curves. Her long brown hair dances effortlessly in the wind as she sits calmly on the bench. Her entire body weight given to the hard plastic. But it doesn’t hurt her sit bones the way it might for you and me. In fact she doesn’t notice as her weight is perfectly spread out along the seat. She looks down and notices the way that the paint has worn away from the steel park bench, and questions how many palms it’s taken to get it to that state of varnish. She is made uncomfortable by the idea of the led entering the palms of the hands that they have, and she wonders if the air is now polluted with the toxic waste. She looks past the armrest and notices the small silver bottle cap nestled into the grass. She bends over and picks it up, walking to the garbage to throw it out because she can’t fathom the idea of those small shards of aluminum sinking deeper into the earths core and disappearing without notice. I’m not trying to make any assumptions, but I imagine you wouldn’t have picked up that cap and thrown it out? Neither would I. But she does.
You and I just sit, continuing to breathe as deeply as we can and not think about the breeze on our faces and how its blows a bit colder than what we would find to be ideal. We have adjusted several times in our seat, stopping our butt cheeks from becoming numb. But not her. She could sit here for hours, even after this podcast is complete.
She is different from me. And maybe from you. She managed to get through the last few minutes without thinking about what will come next, without looking at her phone, or even wanting to, without planning out her next move, or reflecting on the last. Wondering if she left the oven on, if she is dressed appropriately for the entire day, the errands she has to run on her way home, and the friend she is meeting up with for drinks with later tonight.
But I have done all of those things twice over…
I have already gotten my phone out of my bag and checked my messages five, maybe six times. I’ve been thinking about the last 4 hours, and planned out the next eight. But see I am all about efficiency. Getting as much done in the least amount of time as I can. So I can get little bit more out of my day. I got down here at 2:45, on my way I picked up a wrap from Choices market so that I don’t have to waste time cooking when I get home, and I can go straight to doing homework while I watch the good wife which I recorded cause I can’t waste time on the adds. I have meal prepped for the next seven days and I keep Ziploc baggies of on the go granola bars in my bags for the days where I PLAN to sit at my desk through lunch. Usually I will take my laptop to the gym, to ensure that I can continue reading and writing for work during my scheduled workout period. And I am not alone.. there is a reason for TV’s at the gym. For those like me who need a constant distraction. Who are moving through the motions to gain the quote on quote benefits without ever really feeling anything in the present. I go everywhere in a rush, at a great speed, even if I relax – it’s for a planned, scheduled relaxation period time. My every minute – from waking to sleeping is accounted for.
Maybe that sounds hectic and crazy, but I am sure I’m not alone in this mentality. Maybe there are people like me? Maybe you are one of them?
But not, her.
She is patiently waiting, and listening. Sorry not waiting… because there is nothing to be waiting for, she is just simply are here, to listen. She is an observer and she lives life from moment to moment.
So I invite you to join her. For the next thirty seconds, that is all. To observe as much as you can from where you are sitting. Try to notice what you observe and allow our mind to wander if it is straying in the trajectory of an observation.
What did you see. What did you observe? Did you mainly see pictures painted by your minds eye or were you really seeing the place that you’re in.
She sat here. She saw… everything for what it truly was. She doesn’t think about the future, she doesn’t question the past, she just is…
I have never met HER… have you?