When finding is a dead-end and an opening

Theron Desrosier, where would this process of searching and finding the deep web be if it weren’t for your tenacious and persistent looking through the web’s

innumerable replications of canals, burrows, and drains

where categories, and archives seep down into the abyss.

Thankfully, the El Calaboz e-portfolio had gravitas, and gravity.

Found!

Though, in the finding, it hovered in my email account, and the work

piled on and atop of it… for a year.

Thoroughly, weighted, it waited for me to make space, in my brain,

in my memory, for arrivals, findings, routes, and rooting.

2007-2009 WSU archiving returned.

Returning and finding, wrought into my detached memory

the capacity to re-attach and to make that which was fragmented

and lost in space

mine once again.

Downloaded, into paper, into documents, into stapled groups

of substantiation. Evidence.

This really happened. The process really occurred.

This is re-mapping in digital zones. I have a zone.

I’ll remain in my zone. Though, by Indigenous law,

will refute others’ attempts to harvest and mine

that which is irrevocably

mine.

Published by

mtamez

Poet. Historian. Dene Nde' Isdzan. Alleys & Allies (Saddle Tramp Press, 1991) Naked Wanting (U. Arizona Press, 2003) Raven Eye (U. Arizona Press, 2007) Father | Genocide: New & Selected Work, 2008-2018, (in progress) Gathering Together We Decide (co-edited with C. Bejarano & J.P. Shepherd, in progress) We Remained | The history and poetics of Dene Nde' belonging, dispossession, refusal and resurgence in the Big Water Country, 1521-2018 (in progress). B.A. Classic Archaeological Studies (U. Texas at Austin) B.A. Art History (U. Texas at Austin) MFA Poetry (Arizona State University) PhD American Studies, Emphasis Area: Nde' Women's historical perspectives; oral history; memory; human rights; Indigenous rights; archives; militarization; empire; Mexico, Texas, U.S., Canada; borders; genocide; Indigenous methodologies; community-engaged methods.

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