Second Year is CRAZY!!!

OK… 1 more week, one last week of school… and then comes the final… just need to survive this then I’ll be able to live normal life for Christmas

My commute (4hrs/ day), volunteers (6hrs/ week) , and school schedule (6 courses, with 3 labs, and 2 tutorials) are killing me… slow enough that I’m still alive – thank God (?!)

I know, I over achieved on the extra stuff and the extra courses… I should’ve known better, but since I’m pretty much still passing all courses, I should be grateful? (Asian mind set aside, of course.)

Hard to tell you how I feel… I now have chronic headache that starts every night at ~6pm (like now I’m having it). Ringing in my ear that my otologist told me is caused by me having been born with better hearing than others. Too hungry or too full all the time due to not being able to eat on time and stressful eating…

Life is just such a challenge this term that I think if I live through it, I will be more legendary and awesome than ANYONE!

I was going to give up trying to apply for exchange next year, but the thought of holding back my dream for one more year is unbearable… I want to be in LA and find myself a mentor to help me with my music! I want to improve, I want to play music for the rest of my life, even better, make money off it! The application is not that easy, however, we need to plan our courses (yes, when we apply), write essay answers to why I want to exchange, and the worst- I have to have 2 faculty as my reference , meaning, I’d have to befriend 2 profs by the end of next week to be able to submit them as reference on my application due on Dec.9…. THIS IS HORRIBLE! I giggle whenever I am around profs I like. I can’t talk to them without my hands touching my face because I’m nervous and don’t know where to put them. I can’t … just can’t! – I guess I just have to… maybe I’ll just try talking to all the profs and see which one works better… I thought I’m much more active this year… apparently NOT!

I need to try to change my term 2 schedule so my classes will be in the morning, instead of how I planned it (in the afternoon). I did this because I thought it’d be more relaxing when I commute, but the truth is, it’s hindering me from getting any opportunity… I can’t keep volunteering in the lab when the prof isn’t there- that way I’d never get to know him O_O” and knowing a prof is as stated above, very important… oh, fml= =

It all comes back to the fact that I am not active enough… well… it’s really out of question, the worst thing. I want to get involved, but my body just can’t move … *sigh* wasted 1st year and then wasted 2nd year, I guess everyone saw it coming …

I don’t mean to blab on forever, but look, I blabbed on! ok, I shall stop and go study… goodbye!

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