It is a main question that I have answer during whole ASTU class. It is such a simple question, but the meaning behind cannot be define easily. When I type word ‘memory’ in Google, there are various answers for this question. In other words, there are many different perspective towards the concept of memory and its definition. In ASTU class, I had to read an introduction of the book, Tangled Memories, which explain and elaborate about what memory is. The author, Marita Sturken, explains that ‘memory is a narrative rather than a replica of an experience that can be retrieved and relived. ” (Sturken 7). Also, she added the relationship between forgetting and memory that “all memories are created in tandem with forgetting” (Sturken 7). She has her own definition of memory explaining that forgetting also contribute to development of memory. Based on her idea, throughout discussion, we discuss how different people value different aspects between remembering and forgetting.

I think depends on what kind of experience that people have, people rather choose to forget or remember. I am type of person who try to forget but changed after my middle school experience. Before my middle school, I thought memory is not as important as my school grade, because memory did not play important role. Also, my parents, who influenced my ideas a lot, are type of people who believe forgetting is best way to move on with their lives. However, in my middle school year, I had series of hardship that I had to overcame. It was a turning point of my short life time, in both negative and positive way. It is impossible to explain my experience in public (but someday I want to), but I realize it is important to keep my memory in order to move on and not to make same mistake. It was a traumatic experience for me, but ironically, I was able to step forward by reminding myself. In addition, I kept my memories in different forms such as writing journals.

Every single person have different perspective about memory.

What about you?

Which side are you in, to forget or to remember?

After reading Running in the Family, written by Michael Ondaatje, I was very puzzled and fascinated. Specifically, the format of this book was unexpected to me. I heard it is a memoir, but unlike Persepolis, Running in the Family, does not have chronicle order, instead this book has series of poetries and short stories. Some stories are related to author’s father and other family members, on the other hand, other stories were recorded through author’s perspective. Throughout his book, I was able to see that author is on the gray zone between two culture, both Canada and Sri Lanka (Ceylon), which were used to express his own identity.

The concept of identity appeared throughout chapters in this book. Personally, one of the most important part is where author illustrates and describes his own perspective of Asia, such as “I was already dreaming of Asia” (pg. 4) and “Asia. The name was a gasp from a dying mouth. An ancient word that had to be whispered…” (pg.4). He kept describe and emphasize Asia as a foreign land, which explains that he does not have strong relationship with only one culture from his homeland.

From his book, I started to think about my own identity in various perspective. I lived in Korea around 18 years, but studied in Canada for two years (grade 5 to 6) and international school for four years (grade 9 to 12). Since I was influenced by my family and education, I never felt that I am part of one single society.  Also, after coming back from Canada, a middle school that I went was very conservative towards other culture, even though there were large number of students who studied foreign countries. As a result, I did not have chance to think deeply about my identity. I was stuck in a gray zone.

After going to international school, I was exposed to teen-culture from other countries, which gave me second chance to understand  and explore other culture. Studying with teachers from many different cultural background (most of students were Korean…but speak english) again, I have reached to the point where I get concerned about my identity. Now, since studying Canadian University, it is inevitable to stay in gray zone of two different culture or might be more than two depends on what I choose to work. However, as Ondaatje wrote about his identity, someday I will be able to tell others about my own ‘mixed identity’.