I’m graduating from GRS this spring! This has put me into a state of severe turbulence. Or perhaps it’s that I’m 25 and it’s a quarter-life crisis, I’m not quite sure which. Regardless, it seems that every other day I have a new idea, and every week my plans change as to where I want to go and what I want to do once I graduate. I’ll perhaps write more on this in another post, but for now I want to focus on exploring one idea that I’ve had for actually much longer than the last semester or two. I have always wanted to shave my head… maybe not always, but for several years now. I thought to do it in grade 12, but chickened out because of grad photos. Instead I compromised by cutting my hair short and donating the ponytail. The next time I came close was when I cut my hair the shortest it’s ever been to remove my dreadlocks. Once again, but for different reasons at the time, I backed out of buzzing it all off in a Sinead O’Connor-esque style. Looking back, I think that both of those decisions were best at the time. But that leaves me with the perdurable desire to experience what it’s like to have a buzz cut.

When I started to think about writing this blog, I was reminded of my dreadlocks, and a post I’d written when asked about them for a radio show. The questions I responded to then included, “…what is your ethnicity?  Did your ethnicity have any influence on why you decided to dread your hair? (Why did you decide to dread your hair?)  What do they mean to you?  Do you associate yourself with a religious/spiritual connection because of them, or has wearing them changed you in any way (diet, beliefs, empowerment, etc.) And if you could see yourself ever cutting them (why/why not?)”. Being bald is an entirely different look, and would be perceived very differently within society. Nevertheless I’m sure similar lines of questioning would arise, and also my motives would be somewhat overlapping. For example, the drive behind both is ^aesthetics and curiosity.   I never felt connected to an external motivation. However, I did write in my post about having them: “Since I got my dreadlocks, they have become more and more a part of who I am. They definitely affect the way people see me and judge me, I noticed that the day I got them. But personally I feel that it is for the better. Wearing them has definitely influenced me in a lot of ways. I believe that the people I meet are different because of them, … As with any learning, this has led me to see things, and a lot of aspects of life, differently.” On that note, I have a feeling that shaving my head will also create reaction and judgment. As Kate Fridkis wrote in her blog post about shaving her head, “Women are supposed to be attached to their hair, and their hair is supposed to be attached to them. It’s one of the most obvious signs of femininity and if a woman shaves it all off, she either has cancer, is majorly depressed, or is rebelling against society. My decision to buzz my hair was not for any of those reasons. I am not dying of anything. I’m not that rebellious.”

She went on to explain, “The only reason I am “getting away with it” is because I did it anyway. A funny thing happened once I got a buzz cut. I feel sexier than before. I feel more feminine. I started wearing higher heels, I started dressing up more. I was suddenly striking, and it has been incredibly fun. My closely cropped hair draws attention to the little things that make me different. It highlights my strong nose, my profound love of big belts, my smile.” And that, “Buzzing your hair knocks down that fourth wall.”

Another great blog post by Shannon Haley expresses the same reaction I get from people when I say I’m going to shave my head. They think that I am being “brave” or “daring”, which is simply not the case. Shannon writes, “So when I shaved my head, nothing annoyed me more than being told how “brave” I was. Sure, it was a drastic change, but I don’t need anyone complimenting my decision as brave. I understand the intention behind the word is good; I know that to the people who said something, going against a societal norm seems daring. I appreciate the sweetness and kind words that have been directed at me, but I just can’t get on board with the idea that it’s brave. I cut my hair because I wanted to.  Not because I’m sick or anything to do with sexual identity or trying to make a point. I did it simply because I wanted to and I could.”

She continues that, “It’s easy to associate long hair with femininity because this is what we’ve been told since childhood. But, I have very short hair and I’m still a woman. I still move, create and love as a woman does.   I’m not trying to imply that all women should shave their heads to feel liberated. But using a word like brave to describe a haircut shows just how screwed up our society’s ideas of what constitutes beauty — and bravery — are. I am brave, but not because I cut my hair.”

I’ve stolen quite a lot of words from Kate and Shannon, partially because I don’t have those experiences yet, but also if I do shave my head, I have a feeling that my sentiments will be similar. Perhaps not, but their words resonated with me. I suppose there is only one way to find out…

Fridkis, K. Girl Talk: Why I Got A Buzz Cut. 2011.

http://www.thefrisky.com/2011-10-12/girl-talk-why-i-got-a-buzz-cut/

Haley, S. It Took Me 10 Years To Shave My Head. This Is What Annoyed Me Most After I Did. 2015.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-21387/it-took-me-10-years-to-shave-my-head-this-is-what-annoyed-me-most-after-i-did.html