Hello again!  At the beginning of the year I wouldn’t have imagined I’d say this, but WOW, I SURE AM HAPPY TO BE BACK IN THE CLASSROOM WITH LITTLE PEOPLE!  On a more serious note, it was great seeing my SA in the morning again.  Morning strategy-planning/debriefing/preparation provides a slightly different warm fuzzy feeling than learning and absorbing new information and skills within the classroom… maybe a bit more orange.  On a lighter, second note, the more casual tone is representative of today’s realizations…

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The students missed me!  They asked about me!  Outside, I was all, “Oh, heh, that’s awesome, kids.”  Inside, I was like, “OH REALLY, YOU GUYS ARE THE BESTEST BEST KIDS I WANNA HUG ALL OF YOU!!!”  Definitely one of those awesome hug-a-bear feelings that you can only get from being a parent or a teacher.  Oh yes, I liken teaching to parenting, albeit higher stakes (though each could make a strong argument for their case).  Today, I feel confident.  Today, I feel prepared… because today, I will be teaching math!  I had horrible experiences with math while I was younger, but slowly (and surely) I overcame my challenge and have since remained inseparable with math — I’ve tutored math for over 10 years.  I admit, today my breath definitely smelled of hubris… was what I thought.  More likely conceit, but who’s keeping score anyway?

Last post, I mentioned that I realized that one of my biggest pitfalls is that I idealize the students to the point of overlooking telltale red flags that would otherwise indicate a change of strategy.  To compensate, I began by sounding like a stiff board and rushed out the gate with heavy content-laden questions, guaranteed to scare even the hardiest of my supporters from even trying to learn!  My SA is constantly gushing about how far her class has gone since last year, and to this day I cannot imagine the same students who occasionally rib me from time to time as little whirling tornadoes of destruction, creating messes and disruptive behaviour throughout the classroom.  I mean, when I say things like, “everybody, can I have your attention please?” they actually turn their heads and look in my general direction.  Unfortunately, the class did not really offer me any chances to practice those interesting classroom management techniques during the math lesson.  Bummer.

One undeniably positive thing that happened today was E stepping up to bat for Ol’ Mr. Tsang when he was floundering about.  Let me tell you a little bit about E.  This child comes from a very difficult home environment, yet for some reason remains extremely resilient.  If there ever were a child who should not be cheerful it’s E.  He is full of energy, chatty, and very bright; sometimes I can see a sparkle in his eye whenever we talk about something that really catches his attention.  Which is why it is so frustrating to see him constantly making careless errors, forgetting his homework, completing his homework incorrectly, forgetting and otherwise demonstrating complete disinterest and/or understanding of instructions… it’s very hard to look at E and not be disappointed.  That’s not to say he isn’t trying hard, which adds to the frustration.  I’m pulling VERY HARD for this kid to succeed because he NEEDS for his efforts to be validated.  He NEEDS to see that he can contribute in a positive way.  It broke my heart 2 weeks ago when I made the mistake of asking, “Who feels that they are a bad person?” and without hesitation, E shot his hand up high into the air and looked me right in the eyes.  I saw no guilt in his eyes.  What I saw was trust — he was not proud to admit that to the class, and it took a lot of courage for him to put his hand up like that; he was joined shortly by two other hands.  But what I saw in his eyes was “because I trust you, I am going to take a risk and share”.  I froze up and for a few seconds, I was completely overwhelmed at his simple gesture… I nodded in his direction, and quickly changed the topic.

Anyway, E…  I care for all my students equally.  Thing is, with E, I also really, really, REALLY hopes that one day he succeeds.  If I could help him succeed in any way, I would be extremely grateful.  Today… I felt he succeeded.  Here is what E did.

I was teaching a lesson on BEDMAS.  I was nearly through everything I had to say, and upon scanning the room, my eyes were met with quite a few confused looks.  They looked maybe… 50-60%?  While I was scratching my brain and moving my mouth-parts, E put up his hand and asked a question I did not expect to come from him.  As I was looking for a good way to gather my words and explain things, E put up his hand and asked a guiding question — he had noticed that I had not yet gone over the fact that multiplication/division are equally important, and that the only rule governing them was “left to right”.  And he asked me specifically in a way to get me to give that explanation and dig that idea out of the myriad ideas swimming about in my head.  Oh, he didn’t stop there.  He kept asking guiding questions until most of the students in the classroom began slightly nodding their heads.  Not only did E understand Order of Operations, he helped me teach the class!  While I would prefer that he demonstrate his leadership abilities in some other manner (preferably not at my expense), he did a fantastic job.  I look forward to telling this story to everyone I meet.

So, that is E’s story.  It’s a story of how a struggling student saved a drowning teacher candidate.  Okay, perhaps I am exaggerating a bit… I wasn’t quite drowning, but my head was definitely beneath the water.  Today, I learned the value of simple instruction.  I am a wordy person; words follow me, and I like to throw punctuation everywhere.  But from now on, fewer words.  Simpler words.  Effectiver instructions.  Okay, that’s enough out of me.  But I get the point — right now, the goal is maximizing everyone’s success.  And E has shown me that I’m not simply being optimistic.  I look forward to sharing similar stories about everyone else in the class.

PS — another student, D, approached me after class and said, “Thank you for today’s math lesson, Mr. Tsang.”  I was slightly confused, so I asked D for clarification — you’re welcome, and I really appreciate your thanks, D.  But what exactly do you mean?”  He responded (that was one of his spelling words!), “before today’s lesson, I didn’t get Order of Operations at all.  But after you taught that lesson, I really get it now.”  Next week, I’ll tell D that it was actually E who deserves most of the credit for that lesson.

PPS — E approached me while the class was working independently and asked me, “Mr. Tsang, I think I’m done… do you think I can tutor anybody?”  Let’s see if we can’t turn him into a classroom resource!  He gets his own tag now.