Leadership is a bit like being “cool”. It is difficult to describe at times, although people can often tell who is and who is not. It is awkward to label yourself, but normal for others to use the terms as descriptors. Unfortunately, I believe many people get it wrong, because we filter reality through our own perceptions. We are “cool” and “leaders” in our own ways, and it often changes in different roles. As an athlete, leadership is optional, but highly recommended for those who wish to achieve their potential. Especially in a system that does not favour those who do not take their own initiatives, I have taken leadership roles as an athlete as often as I could. However, as a coach, leadership is necessary because it is part of the job. Whether it is just a job, a career, or a calling, leadership is necessary in coaching.

As I am fortunate to have extensive competitive experience as an athlete, I have worked with many coaches over the years. This is a benefit as it gives me a dual perspective: 1) as a player, what I want from a coach, and 2) as a coach, how can I best develop a player in the current competitive context? I have had some great coaches over the years and some that have not been as strong. However, I feel I can still learn something from anyone, and this is simply another life lesson from sport as it happens in many different contexts in life. With that said, I can also learn from the mistakes of others in hopes to prevent making the same mistake in the future. From a coaching perspective, when working with young athletes, I first try to find their goals. Without goals, we cannot establish accountability, and it makes it hard to move in the right direction. If goals are set and we are on the same page, then my focus is to try to get them to the level of badminton I have achieved, with the intention of getting them there in a shorter timeline than it took me. That way, there is room to grow the athlete to become better than my former achievements. Should another coach be more suitable for that player, then our journey together ends. Perhaps it is a bit like having children: for some families, they work hard so that their children can have a better life. As a coach, I want to work hard so my athletes can enjoy a better competitive career. It does not always end up that way, but at least it is the intention.

Returning to my perceptions of leadership, I think of leadership as taking the initiative to do something. Context is always important, as a person can be a leader for starting something, yet another person can also be a leader for discontinuing. Leadership to me is a neutral, and can be used for both good and bad things. For example, from the Leadership Practices Inventory (LPI), “Challenging The Process” is one aspect of leadership which can have positive effects in the long run, but often seen as a negative thing in the short term. This was my highest scoring practice on the LPI and is quite unique to me in my situation, as I play a dual role of athlete and coach. As I am not in a high performance coaching role (which would be an immediate conflict of interest), I have smaller coaching roles at the moment, with minimum conflicts. It then becomes difficult for my Observers to rate me as a coach, and I believe most have rated me as a player, which is the best I can do at the moment. Despite the difficulties, the LPI has offered some insightful feedback which I will elaborate on with a bit more depth than in our assignment.

The results of the LPI are mixed, with some high and low scores, but in the end, the trends are the same. Using the graph from our results (see below this paragraph), the curve generally stays similar in shape and is simply translated higher or lower, which means that most of my Observers rated me in a similar fashion with respect to each practice. The first 3 practices (Model the Way (MTW), Inspire a Shared Vision (IASV), and Challenge the Process (CTP)) are my best, with CTP being the highest rated, while the last 2 practices (Enable Others To Act (EOTA) and Encourage The Heart (ETH)) were the lowest. Based on the results, the “Observers” that I chose to be “Managers” were my coaches and sport administrators, while “Co-workers” were fellow athletes. The Managers were the largest group and their answers were almost identical to the average of all the observers. Answers from the Co-workers were the lowest, even lower than my own ratings, but there are probably some good reasons for that.

Based on the sample of “Co-workers” I have selected, some are current partners, training partners, former partners, and opponents. I have likely competed against most of these athletes one way or another, and my track record against most of the players have been generally positive. With that said, I do believe that each athlete has their own interpretation of what it means to be successful as a Canadian badminton player, and I have disagreed with many of them one way or another. As Dr. Van Neutegem would say, “Show me the evidence.” I believe in accountability and I know my own goals and how I hope to get there. I have seen many athletes succeed in the past, but I have seen more of them fail. To me, leadership often means to lead by example and not be caught up in the little things, such as trying to get recognition or informing others that I am “leading”. Perhaps high achievers are not actually intending to lead, but are simply working hard on their goals. Leadership for me as an athlete is just a byproduct of finding ways of becoming successful and achieving my personal goals in the sport. It is not too surprising if other athletes rate me low, because as an athlete, it is not my job to help them develop. Exceptions are made in training, as I will always give others my best as I expect the same from them, but the directions we choose as athletes are our own. Recently, I realized that I need to take care of my own tasks as an athlete before worrying about what my partner needs to do (to prevent blaming others). I am still evolving as an athlete, which constantly shifts my perspective when I switch to a coaching role.

The intial reaction from the written feedback in the LPI was a bit of anger and frustration, but when I change the context from a coach back to an athlete, the feedback makes a lot more sense, except the comment about giving less time to my social life (because I have practically no social life already). A lot of the feedback in things I need to do more is to be more positive, supportive, and encouraging. As a coach, I would agree with the feedback and I would like to think I do these things as a coach, which is why I felt offended initially. However, as most of the Observers know me best as an athlete, it starts to make sense because I can have a pretty nasty competitive edge on some people. I guess there are both pros and cons to being both athlete and coach because I almost have to juggle two different characters. But in the end, isn’t that just part of life where we juggle different roles in family life, work life, sport life, and other life?

Some of the changes I hope to make based on the results of my LPI are to ask for more feedback and communicate with others better. Despite the fact that communication can have a chicken and egg conundrum (i.e. who communicates first?), as leadership involves taking the initiative, I will initiate if I have to, because I will always reap the benefit for asking, whether I get feedback or not. Although many people feel I lead by example, I am simply on a journey for personal growth: how can I become a better person? What works for me may not work for someone else, and to judge my leadership based on what I do is not “fair”, but since that is someone else’s perspective, I am not one to judge, nor am I one to care. People often succumb to the Halo Effect, and often one particular trait overrides everything else in positive or negative ways. For example, being an Olympian, some people can give me halos that I am competitive, hard working, and athletic, despite not knowing whether I am or not outside of my sport. For those who believe I am an influence to younger players, I am grateful, but I must also heed a warning best quoted by Bruce Lee: “Absorb what is useful. Discard what is not. Add what is uniquely your own.” And as a new coach, I want to do exactly that. I want to learn from the best, but I don’t have to be exactly like them. I can model their coaching ability, use their best techniques, but also discard their vices and improve on their weaknesses. As an athlete, I always try to find a better way to reach my true potential. As a coach, I don’t think it’s any different except I have to start at the bottom. With experience as an athlete and being part of an incredible coaching program at UBC, I’m definitely on the right track.

Maybe I don’t need to swim to lead a ship.