Category Archives: Self-Care

When Roger, the director of Health and Wellness, asked me to write a post for their blog, I enthusiastically said yes.  Seven years ago, if I had the knowledge I have now, I would have been much more successful during my time at university.  Not many of my friends and family are aware of the extent of my struggles during my university years; I was so often anxious and down.  I hope sharing my story with you will help you recognize the importance of exercise and nutritious eating as a part of your self-care routine.

It was September of 2009 when I stepped off the plane into British Columbia, ready to take on the next challenge: university.  I remember walking down the hallway of Nicola Residence Building, running into my roommate, who is now a lifelong friend, and introducing myself.  At this point I was approximately 185lbs, and excited for life after high school: partying, having fun, going to class and living off the meal plan!

Living in residence, I would walk down to a campus food service when hungry, buy breakfast, lunch and dinner.  Whenever someone else on my floor felt hungry, it seemed like normal practice for everyone to walk down together.  Too often, it turned out that I would have a second dinner, which was also often pizza from the late night menu at The Well.

Over the next three years, academic pressures increased and I got more involved on campus, which meant more meetings and constant deadlines. I began to find excuses not to exercise and, very soon after, exercise altogether became an afterthought.  When third year of university came around, I was 248lbs, my grades dropped, and I frequently visited the doctor and nurse on campus.

I continued through my third year without thinking twice about my decisions on a day to day basis. I regularly ate in the cafeteria, ordered takeout or delivery, and quickly scarfed down food while I was either studying or working.  One of my friends even took me aside to tell me sternly that they were concerned about my habits and health.  Yet, it was not until the end of my third year in the management program that I decided to make a drastic change.  To be honest, I didn’t think that I would make it far, but I thought: “let’s see where I get this time.”

I committed to an exercise regimen and started to adopt healthier eating habits; it was two of the most difficult things that I have done in my life! Yet, with hard work and dedication to these decisions, at the beginning of my fourth year , I noticed some of the unhealthy weight start to shed.  Now, two years later, I am back to a healthy weight for my body again.  While the numbers on the scale are markers I am proud of, what I am happiest about is the realization that I can be so much more productive and positive in my daily life when I eat nutritious foods and exercise regularly.

What I realized from this experience was that while parents, professors, and peers can tell me what they believe is good for me, I had to make the decision and commitment to prioritize my own health first; for me, this was through committing to eating a balanced diet while being active and exercising regularly.  Doing so allowed me to accomplish my other priorities as a student a lot easier, too.  My grades drastically improved, I woke up energized and ready to tackle the day, I showed up to class on time, and most importantly, I became a happy and positive individual.  So this is what I want to emphasize: make your health a priority, take care of yourself.

– Curtis Tse
UBC Okanagan Alumni 

A month before the last term of my Counselling graduate program, I stumbled upon this cartoon while scrolling aimlessly down my Facebook newsfeed.  I hadn’t known it at the time, but several months later as I wrote a final reflection paper for my program supervisor, this sentiment expressed by Jim Rohn epitomized one of the most valuable messages I learned in my three years of training to be a professional helper.

Many of us seem to learn at an early age that helping others is a respectable behavior and taking care of others an even more refined and honorable ability than the former.  As children, we are taught to look out for our siblings; if we are the elder child, we may have even been told explicitly to help take care of our younger siblings.  As adolescents and young adults, we begin to take care of close friends–lending them notes if they miss class, being their sounding board when they feel down, even sometimes giving them rides or other resources as necessary.  Both men and women (perhaps more so women, but that’s another post for another blog) are messaged to take care of their partners, their spouses–in other words, to take care of each other.  

In our highly individualized society, of course, there is great importance in taking good care of one another.  Having recently moved to a new city for the first time in my life, I would surely attest to community and social support being key players in my feelings of wellness each and every day.  I am not dismissing the value of mutual care-taking.

However, in my years of studying the skills and theories of helping, I have also noticed an uprising in the emphasis on self-care as an essential pillar of well-being.  Some emphases are larger than others, but the seed has certainly been planted and is growing fast.  We–whether helping professionals, students, or other individuals who are too often inclined to help, care, and overextend to others on a daily basis– need to remember to also take care of ourselves.  Why?  Because we can!  We know ourselves best.  Our bodies tell us what we need when we need it–whether it is rest, food, social connection, or physical activity sometimes; we just need to learn to look for and listen to the signs and signals.  We are stronger, more resilient, and more capable of caring for ourselves than we know and it takes doing to actually see it and believe it.  Think about it: What are your strengths?  What are your resources?  How do you care for others?  Practicing excellent self-care maintains your physical and mental health, thus facilitating more positive relationships, effective learning, productive work, and–in fact, improves your ability to support others you care about when they need it.

Do you have favorite self-care strategies you want to share with us?  Leave a comment!

CREATE, Sept 2016

Our Health and Wellness team has been giving away star-shaped stress balls at a number of orientation-related events the last little while.  Have you seen them?  These bright yellow stars were intentionally designed to say “I am resilient” on one side because we hope that, as a student, you remember that you are resilient when you face the various challenges of university life.

Yes, you will face challenges–maybe even several!  Just remember you can face those challenges using the many strengths and coping strategies you already have.  Being resilient doesn’t mean having a problem free life; and it does it mean toughing things out on your own.  It means learning to manage setbacks in healthy effective ways so that you can get back on track and refocus on your academic and personal goals.  Being resilient means that you see problems such as failing an exam, arguing with a roommate, or feeling lonely as temporary and changeable.

We’ve talked with many UBCO students over the years, and this is what they say helps them be resilient:

Get involved

Try to find value in more than just your marks. Get involved in clubs, course and student unions, intramurals, the Academic Involvement Centre, or anything on campus that interests you.  Finding value and connection in different areas means that when you face a setback in one area of life you can still feel positive about another area of life.

Set realistic expectations

Expectations can be a useful way to motivate yourself; however, setting unrealistic expectations (e.g. I must achieve 90% in every course) results in feelings of defeat and failure. Ensure your expectations are possible and flexible in the event that life gets in the way.

Take care of yourself

Maintaining healthy eating, sleeping and exercise habits can have a big effect on your health. Sleep, diet and exercise give us the energy we need to manage small life stressors.

Manage your emotions

Managing emotions means recognizing when you are overwhelmed and learning to calm yourself down. Start by taking a deep breath. Avoid making any big decisions until you are in a calm state.

Help others

Helping others means shifting the focus from ourselves to someone else. This can make us feel more connected to others and our place in the world feel more meaningful.

Use your strengths and assets

Students are often so focused on improving that they forget to use what they are already good at. Take time to identify your strengths and assets. Using these daily builds confidence and helps us remember that we are capable, worthy people.

Laugh lots!

Humour can make any situation better. Is it possible to see the funny side of the problem? Find opportunities to make yourself laugh.

Avoid unhealthy coping strategies

Isolating, avoiding, and misusing alcohol and drugs are strategies people use to try to avoid pain. This may provide temporary relief, but eventually will make the problem worse.

Be kind to yourself

You likely will make a mistake or two this year, and may even feel ashamed or discouraged. Accept this and treat yourself with compassion. Treat yourself as you would a friend who made the same mistake.

Accept: “it is what it is’

We tend to fight against distressing thoughts and feelings trying to “will them” away. This struggle only serves to cause increased distress. There are some situations we just can’t change. Try to accept these feelings rather than avoid them.

If you’ve discovered strategies that you find helpful and would like to share them with us and/or other students, we would love to hear from you!  Just comment below 🙂