The Lover – a reflection

Despite this book’s uncomfortable age gap relationship, I really enjoyed reading it. The way Duras writes “The Lover” hooked me the entire time. Her descriptions of the environment, like Saigon, to each complex and rich character, I felt so immersed in this novel. My heart was in this one! I really loved the first sentence of both the first and second paragraphs. They were so ambiguous but so intriguing!

“One day, I was already old”

“Very early in my life it was too late.”

I also really appreciated the rich, while incredibly heartbreaking, depiction of mental illness. The mother obviously struggles immensely and her stability wavered all of Duras’ life. This affected the rest of her life so much and painted the whole novel with a little bit of tragicness. The line, “I tell him that when I was a child my mother’s unhappiness took the place of dreams.” (46) broke my heart! While her relationship with the man from Cholon is an important aspect of this novel, I found that Duras’ relationship with her Mother is more complex and attention-capturing. It remained such a persistent part of Duras’ soul, and her Mother’s sadness, which she stated multiple times she couldn’t name, shadows over every part of her life.

For being so young, Duras already experienced so much, but her affair with the man from Cholon ended any hope of another chance at childhood. I’ve actually seen a little bit of the movie they made from this book but didn’t realize the connection until I started to read. I’m not sure if I could watch the movie now after reading the book.

Place is so important in this text as well. Not only place as the environment, France or the colonies, Europe or Asia, but place in relation to social status, like social class. The man from Cholon is very rich and lives a lavish life. But despite his high economic status, there is still such a gap because of his race. When he takes Duras’ family out to dinner, they won’t even speak to him, they can’t be seen together in public, or get married (not taking into account the age difference of course!). Even though the older brother is poor and so much lower in economic class, there still is superiority with his whiteness, and that he uncomfortably asserts excessively. The writing really painted this divide vividly and helped me to understand the social landscape of Duras’ adolescence.

While I did like how the book switched from first to third person, it left me feeling confused a lot of the time. Around pages 87-90, I was unsure if Duras was writing about herself in the third person or about someone else. There were parts where I was like, is she pregnant? Did the man from Cholon kill himself? Obviously, he didn’t, but some things still feel unclear to me even after reading. I honestly would go back and read this again in like a month to see if I catch anything different.

I copied one quote down: “I am worn out with desire for Helene Lagonelle.” (73). This piqued my interest as it added another layer to Duras and made me wonder if this was sexual desire or maybe a desire in the same way she is “possessed” by the man from Cholon? I would love to hear what you all think about it!

See you in class:)

3 thoughts on “The Lover – a reflection

  1. Katie Wong

    Hi Grace, I agree with how captivating and complex the narrator’s relationship was with her mother. It definitely had a significant influence on most, if not all, of the narrator’s other aspects of her life, like her identity and relationships. I also found it interesting how she discussed it many times throughout the book, but never explicitly shared what exactly her mother was struggling with even though it played such a critical role in both of their lives.

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  2. Tes

    Grace, the descriptive language is most certainly captivating. I hadn’t thought about the ambiguity you pointed out but I think it comes to play throughout the novel as well even when describing the events on the boat towards the end. You weren’t the only one commenting on the mother-daughter relationship and I am glad since it definitely deserves attention. In a lot of ways she carries contradictory feelings about her actions: wanting to make her happy, wanting to be financially stable while also being worried and in some ways ashamed of what her mom might think. The narrative switch definitely leaves things a little up in the air at times.

    Thanks for your comment!
    – Tesi

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  3. Dhwani Ved

    I was also unclear when the point of view changed, however once I understood, I reread those parts and I think that really helped.

    Reply

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