I never understood the problem African American women had with interracial dating between black men and white women until I came to Canada. Before I go on I have to say, it is nothing personally to do with white women and mostly to do with SOME black men(Don’t wanna get hit with the #notallblackmen).

I am open to dating white men like a lot of other black girls in Vancouver but it becomes difficult when the majority of white men that hit on you see you as a conquest. “You know I like black girls”, “I have never tried hot chocolate”, “You are pretty for a black girl” are among the racist pickup lines black girls encounter on a normal night out. I mean even if they don’t say it, one wonders if they are thinking it. I speak mainly on white men here because most guys from other races date within their race, at least from my observance.

No Big deal, at least we still have black men right? WRONG! The stereotype of the ‘Angry Black woman’ has hunted us for too long and you’d think black men would know better, with all the stereotypes they have to deal with. The amount of times I have heard a black guy say to me that he’d rather date a white girl over a black girl because we are too much to deal with, is ridiculous. I have judged your whole existence as a normal functioning human being and we will never be having an intellectual conversation about race, gender, politics…or anything of significance after such ignorance. BUT for those who are curious and don’t particularly need a history lesson, I’ll tell you why this evidently makes me heated, summarized in a quote from “Angry Black Woman: An Exploration of Black Women’s Responses to Interracial Relationships” by Erica Chito Childs

“As a Black woman, it is difficult enough to have to deal with whites who [act] as if [Black] is inferior, but it is even harder to have your own men act like white is better and systematically choose white women over you; it is hard not to get angry because it feels as if no one values your worth as a woman. You grow up with these men all your life, but then you’re not good enough to be a wife…. It’s disrespectful and degrading”

I have overheard a black African guy tell another black African guy when he had just arrived in Vancouver that he should just ignore the black girls in Vancouver and go for the white girls because he already had enough of that back home. The notion of white superiority is still rampant in our black communities and is evident in media with black men systematically choosing white women over black women after gaining success.

And if you light skin black girls are not relating because you don’t have this problem, it’s probably because you are LIGHT SKIN.  I know ya’ll have your own struggles but this isn’t one of them.