Home means many things for many people. It could be a person, a place, a building, or even a memory. I think as we age the concept of home has an element of nostalgia where we may reflect on the place we grew up or the people with whom we grew up. For me, home is complicated and ever-changing.
Since I was born I have moved 23 times, so home is not really a building or structure in which I have lived. On top of that, my parents have divorced multiple times, so I was constantly shuffling between mum and dad’s house. I also cannot relate with home being a person or a specific memory. For these reasons, “home” has never been a comfortable topic or concept for me – in fact, I struggled greatly to figure out how to write this assignment. In fact, before this assignment, I kind of self-identified as not having a home. This assignment has made me reflect on myself, my past, and what is meaningful to me.
Through this clichéd “journey of self-exploration”, I have a better sense of what my home is (although I’m still not entirely convinced). I can best define home as Vancouver, the city I grew up in. Through all the changes in my life, the one constant has been Vancouver. (Although, I feel the need to add that I am excluding the two years where I lived in Victoria and the brief four months where I lived in New Brunswick).
When I think of home, this is the first thought that comes to mind:
Nestled between the Cascades and the Pacific Ocean, Vancouver is my favourite place on earth. Many of my childhood memories have taken place here. Many of the people I love live or have lived here. Vancouver has always been a place of promise and opportunity for me; however, I feel internal conflict talking about Vancouver in this way because I am well aware of my own privileges that have given me these opportunities.
When I graduated high school in June 2011, I decided to move to Sackville, New Brunswick and attend Mount Allison University. I went there for three reasons: firstly, I had a friend there who graduated from my high school a year ahead of me and she convinced me that it was the best university filled with the best people. Secondly, it was the school that offered me the most scholarship money and I really wanted to move out of the house. Thirdly, it had been listed year after year in MacLean’s as the top undergraduate university in Canada. I was so excited at this complete change of scenery and the opportunity to reinvent myself and meet new people. Unfortunately, my excitement didn’t last long and I ended up ending my stay there shortly after the first week of second semester.
There were many reasons why I couldn’t stay there anymore. Of course, I missed my friends and family – when you move away you have to recreate a more immediate/nearby support network and that can be hard when you’re living in huge buildings filled with 17-20 year olds who are all just thrilled to not be under their parents’ rules. However, the main reason why I couldn’t stand living there was because I missed Vancouver. I missed the freedom I had, where I could hop on a city bus/train and go nearly anywhere. I missed the gorgeous skyline of Cypress, Grouse, and Seymour that I too often took for granted. I missed the hikes and forests right at my front door. I even missed the gloomy rainy days. (I’ll take that over blizzards and -45º C wind chills any day!)
It may sound ridiculous to some of you that my home is best described as a city, but out of all the places I’ve travelled, I have never seen such unique beauty as Vancouver has to offer. (I will admit, my travel list isn’t extensive, but is still a decent amount!)
My experiences at Mount Allison were unforgettable. I discovered an entire new side of myself, I made new friends (with some of whom I am still incredibly close), and I had a lot of crazy adventures! However, nothing will replace my love for Vancouver. While I still love to travel and go to new places and have new adventures, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to call another place home.
____________
Works Cited
