Category Archives: iDontActuallyKnow

I’M PREGNANT

(Cool, it’s good to know that pregnancy at a reasonably young age still gets people’s attention. Like, my faith in humanity has been temporarily restored.)

So, let me be the first to say, HAPPY OCTOBER…! (Okay, minus the happy, right?)

But, seriously, we’ve almost made it through a month.

Can you hold on for a second, life? You’re going by too fast.

In that time, I’ve encountered countless new faces, countless questionable hot dishes, and one priceless look from my ASTU prof, when I walked in late, with a cob of corn hanging from my mouth.

Last week, though, I had to give birth to my FIRST academic paper. [shrieking]

The experience was pretty terrifying/exhausting mentally.  I basically felt like I was on 16 and Pregnant, and I was going to shoot out something that would basically haunt me for the rest of my life, as it was coming out too soon, with not enough thought put into it.

So, I had to deal with the aftermath of that, which was not doing my readings for my other class that day. And we did an in-class reflection on the readings, which I did not read. And it was 10% of my final mark. And I sort of cried inside for five minutes, but then I wrote down some gibberish on the paper to make it actually look like some “reflecting” was done internally, but really my brain was just like:

But, like, that is what first year is all about, right?

Making every single mistake possible, so that you’ll never make the same one again?

But, I never make the same mistake twice…

…I make it three or four times, just to make sure that it is indeed truly a bad thing.

SO, CHEERS, TO ROYALLY SCREWING UP! GO BIG, OR GO HOME!

and MAY ALL YOUR FEARS OF MAKING MISTAKES REST IN PEACE.

Black is the new black.

Hey, dear frienemies, wassssup?

The ceiling? ok. cool. you’re a homebody like me too. So, we can be friends now… ignore the whole “frenemies” thing. I was kidding.

Anyway, I am here to talk about the colour black. As, to me, it is not simply a shade, it is a colour that I live my life in from the months of approximately mid-September, to about March.

Why? Well, I have made a list.

20 Reasons Why Wearing Black is Bangin’:

1. It goes with anything.

2. Stains are less visible!

3. It makes you look more put together. (Unless you’re wearing sweats, in which case, you still look as dishevelled as Lindsay Lohan, circa 2008, when she tried to put out a new album, and then she just didn’t.)

4. Day to Night, in a flashhhh!

5. Because Leather Jackets.

6. It will never go out of style.

7. Black Swan. ‘Nuff said.

8. Your instagram photos look more artsy in black+white.

9. No one ever said, “No black pants after Labour Day.”

10. I get more compliments on the days I wear black, than on the days I don’t.

11. Because Black Toques.

12. Hides your “Amanda Bynes” areas, that you don’t feel should garner the public’s attention.

13. You feel like you got $WAG.

14. Crossing a black cat’s path won’t be bad luck anymore. (I think?) (Two negatives make a positive right?) (Don’t take that as a math question, I don’t know that. I’M AN ARTS STUDENTS, OK?!)

15. Coco Chanel was pretty into black. (and by “pretty,” I mean every picture on Google Images has her in black.)

16. I’m typing in black, RIGHT NOW.

17. Your behind is gonna look damn fiiiiiine in black skinny jeans.

18. Johnny Cash wrote “Man in Black,” he didn’t write “Man in Yellow.” That man knew which way was up.

19. “Once you go black, you never go back.” Right?

20. Because I said so.

ANYWAY, HERE’S TO A SEASON FULL OF BLACK.

HERE’S TO LESS HEADACHES IN THE MORNING FIGURING OUT WHAT TO WEAR.

HERE’S TO BEING COMFORTABLE.

HERE’S TO ME GETTING OFF THE SOAPBOX.

~MAY YOUR FASHION CRISES REST IN PEACE.~