Phreshman Year

hey, so i totally disappeared for a month, and i apologize for that, but sometimes writing is not really what you think it should be and you have like loads of things that you’ve started blogging about that are just sitting in your draft folder that don’t actually turn into anything.

click. clack.

So, I’m going to be super narcissistic and write about my uni lyfe. cause it’s all happening. and it’s happening fast.

here are the things about phreshmen year that are making me tick. and tock:

Identity Crisis

I had a pile of clothes and hangers on the ground today, because like, i dont actually know what my style is anymore. I mean like things are preppy and then some things are punk and then some things are straight up leopard print. like, what is MEE-OW?

but, like stocking up on more black, grey, white, and navy is always a thing close to my heart.

and then im like WOW i should be more social. i should friend more people on facebook and take an active role in making a name for myself. why dont more people like my profile picture? i need to instagram more. i need more friends on snapchat so that i can snap them more selfies of me eating out of the nutella jar.

and, then my writing style is a constant identity crisis, because there is how i’m writing right now, super casual, and then there’s also like write-your-seven-page-paper writing and then i’m all “pinkies up, fishes, we must attempt to convey poise and class.”

and sometimes i feel like the colour ink i choose is indicative of my life or something, and like i lost my fave ever red pen during reading week last week and read too much into what the symbolism of that might be and like omg my life is falling apart.

//but then i realize that i can actually buy another one.

i’m just out $6 because kewl pens are rlly expensive, and life lesson: swag costs money, kids.

Classes in General

So, honestly box, I’m not a huge fan of really any of the courses I’m taking right now, except for German.

–which, like really sucks.

——- because i’m paying money for them

———- and paying money for things that you aren’t getting swag out of is like eating biscuits without gravy. you feel me? (side note: honey butter is also acceptable)

but seriously, fri3nds, real talks,

take courses you like. and don’t take a coordinated arts stream unless you absolutely know what you want to do with your life.

because I most certainly do not, and here I am like knee-deep in a creek of ice cold media jargon.

Dreams

what are those????

no, seriously, I walked by Toys ‘R Us last night on Broadway at like 10PM when they were closed and it looked really bleak and I was like: “dreams die in there…”

But, seriously my last year of high school was all:

WOW. D R E A M

 

And this year has just been like:

Profs, tho.

 

So cheers, to the broke student life, and being realistic, and for getting shut down by profs. WINNNNNNING.

..tears

Food

I will never shut up about food, because seriously i can’t figure out how to do the thing most of the time.

I mean do i buy a whole pizza at mercante????? go to vanier caf? go to triple o’s? cry about the knorrs sidekick that is the pasta dish at Ike’s? rant about the sad selection of muffins at stir it up/ buy every candy imaginable there? go to the sub and survey every place ever just to decide that what I REAAALLY want is Tim Horton’s?

like,

what do>>>>????

 

Time Management

Let’s talk about that later.

seriously,

if i don’t plan most everything i basically fall apart and just end up napping the whole day or just marathon-ing Girls or something

Tangents

Full disclosure, I had to go to Tumblr to find that, and then I forgot my password, because I’m usually on my phone when i go on tumblr, and then i had to go check my Gmail, and then there were a bunch of other emails like the fact that Ingrid Michaelson is coming to down again, and is going to venue, and yet again, i will not be 19. and then i just pouted for a sec.

and then i went on youtube, because they also emailed me.

and then i forgot what i was doing.

and then i sort of reflected on the Oscars tonight and I still can’t decide how I feel about them…

DOES THIS EVER HAPPEN TO YOU?

DO YOU EVER JUST DROWN ON THE INTERNET IN WORDS AND GIFs and FEELS and PEOPLE.

UGH.

 

But, honestly, this is a cool time. and a not cool time. but mostly cool.

and i gotta just remember that.

let’s all raise a Starbucks and clink paper cups.

[clinks]

 

 

 

 

My Brain is Delicate…

HEY, SQUIRRELS.

Because there are so. many. squirrels. around campus.  Literally, I overheard some guy say he was going to squirrel hunt this weekend. I was like wow. you are so cool. how do I become you?

And he was like. you can’t. I am you.\

/ and then I got a thousand and three re-blogs on tumblr. Except for PETA.

and everyone was like wow derrick, you are deeper than the deepest depths in the sea. and then we wrote various forms of haiku together, and ate baked quinoa bars that my vegan friend made. It was an average Thursday. #tbt

No, but seriously, guys, I have a point… and the whole guy wanting to go squirrel hunting did happen.

—-

ANYWAY. My point is I basically had the best lecture of my university career today. It was so good, I’m beginning to think that I will actually have a “university career,” and not drop out and become a B-List porn star who works from home.

I seriously thought I hated the class (GRSJ101), but today something just clicked, and I removed my taupe-coloured ignorance glasses and saw the world in a new light today.

I would try to explain it, but my summary powers weaken after a certain hour (8:43PM) and I tend to ramble.

Our generation has a giant battle ahead of fighting the ideals, and heteronormativity presented, though.

I would take more time to explain all these concepts, but like, you have google, and you can figure this out. (and my definition powers are shot..)

And it’s much more interesting if I conclude saying that I finally felt that feeling that people talk about where you come out of a class completely numb, with a new perspective, because you felt like everything you knew going in was a lie.

This feeling is different for everyone, though. Like, I felt really nauseous for about 30mins after. and my head hurt.

but in a good way.

and that’s why i’m at university, I guess.

 

MAY YOUR BRAIN HURT IN THE BEST WAYS.

(and may all your prayers go towards the squirrels, because they might get shot, and die this weekend…)