As the semester gathers speed and midterms make their unwelcome approach, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirl of things. I’m guilty of getting into my school routine and focusing on just one thing at a time in an attempt to get a handle on #unilyfe. And what often suffers is my relationships with others. Now that everyone I know doesn’t conveniently live in res with me, I’ve realized how much work maintaining a friendship is. Friendships are built on shared time, experiences and memories and trying to make time for all that AND a full course load plus whatever else you have going on can be difficult.

As Valentine’s Day rolls around, now is a particularly apt time to think about how much care you put into all your relationships, not just the romantic ones. How do you show your friends and fam you love them?

My top love language is quality time, so for me communicating with my brother means watching the same basketball game while we’re on the phone together.

Loving my sister means answering her many Instagram DMs about “should i wear this one?” “…or this one?”

With some friends, it means staying on the phone till 2AM even though we both gotta get up early. With others, it means keeping regular study dates.

I once read something (yeah, ok, it was on Tumblr) that said “after high school, you realize that you were only friends with some people because you saw them five times a week.” You no longer have automatic, pre-packaged friendships. Adulthood is work. And that includes working to maintain healthy, supportive relationships. Having a ride-or-die squad surrounding me is more important than any grade could ever be.

Today, Pastor Matt Menzel from Westside Church talked about how much our culture is focused on self – our needs, wants and desires. Instead of making the fourteenth about how much someone does or doesn’t love you, look outside of yourself for those who could stand to receive.

Errbody need love.