Monthly Archives: September 2015

checking in to check it out

howdy y’all,

Your favorite Texan is back in action. The last (only) time I wrote was on Imagine Day, also late at night/early in the morning, but it is 4 am now and I need to be up 6 anyway so we’re just going to take this moment to catch up on some of the stuff from the last three weeks.

 

First of all, Happy New Year!

Don’t know what I’m talking about? That’s ok. September 13 marked the beginning of the year 5776 on the Jewish calendar. September 13th and 14th, Rosh Hashanah, are two of the holiest days in the entire year, so I didn’t go to class the first Monday and Tuesday (eep!). My profs were all really accommodating of my absences, but it was still strange going back into class that Wednesday after two days of celebration to… well, class. I missed some lectures I was really interested in, plus its always hard being behind at the beginning of the year.

I don’t regret my choice though. One of the reasons I came to Vancouver and to UBC was to be myself, in all facets, safely and proudly. Being Jewish is an important part of that.

 

Another important part is being queer. I come from a place that is not so accepting of any differences, be it religion, ethnicity, or sexuality. UBC is so much more open and welcoming, and I’m taking advantage of that. I went to Pride UBC’s retreat at the Global Lounge the first Saturday of school and had an absolute blast. It’s important to me that Pride UBC is a resource group and not a club. It anchors it more the to institution or to the student body than the LGBTQ clubs tend to at other institutions (like my high school). Its a cool place with cool people, and whether you fall under the LGBTQAIP+ alphabet soup umbrella or not you should check it out.

 

I haven’t joined as many clubs as I would have liked. I get emails from lots of people, but right now I think I’ll be mostly in Common Energy UBC and/or CiTR. Common Energy I haven’t gone to a meeting yet, but I really support what they’re doing and I want to check it out more. And CiTR…

Guys. CiTR is SO COOL.

Ok I also haven’t been to a meeting for this one yet, but I love public and community media, I love working in all sorts of creative media, from writing on this blog to video editing to radio. I’m really looking forward to working with them.

 

But I still wish I could be even more involved. But apparently at university you have to sleep, eat, and go to class, which takes up a lot of club time. I’m doing the Science One program, which is super demanding! Its a huge adjustment from high school to this level of work. I think I can do it though, I’ll keep you posted.

this turned into a diary entry but hey, this is the scoop, this is whats happening on the ground right now, this is live, this is the sitch- yeah. its 4 am. I should sleep.

 

Next time: campus food! where it’s cheap, where it’s good, and most importantly for us on res, where it takes our meal plan.

And sometime before or after that: Bamfield!

 

later y’all,

megan

imagine failure

I moved into Totem Park on August 18th. 18 days later, out on the curbs of Salish and Haida House, wearing a blue residence shirt and a big yellow button, I helped my peers move into a new life.

It’s weird to be a first year moving in other first years. I’ve only been here a few weeks but my peers kept assuming I was at least a second year (Thank you Jump Start for that extra prep time!).

Impressing people makes me happier than I think I should. I’ve been looking forward to university for years because it’s a fresh start, a chance to know nothing again and not feel judged for it. But I am still terrified of not knowing the right answer. I’m terrified of being less than perfect, of messing up, of being mediocre or saying the wrong thing (which, incidentally, is why this post is going up ON Imagine Day, instead of two days ago like I originally planned).

I’ve spent most of the last 18 years in total fear of failure. Below an 90 on a test was embarrassing, below an 80 was unacceptable. Answer wrong out loud in class and I would spend the rest of the day hiding in shame from the teacher. If a joke isn’t funny, exit the conversation immediately. Spill a drink? Walk away quickly before anyone notices.

Living like this just gives me an upset stomach and no ability to function in the real world. People mess up all the time in the real world! Public figures mess up! My friends mess up! How am I so willing to literally forget their mistakes and not mine? Psychology majors, please comment with your answers, I actually want to know.

Knowing these things about myself, here’s my personal challenge for Imagine UBC and the rest of this year: imagine not being perfect.

I invite everyone who reads this to do it with me. Imagine not being perfect. Instead of being afraid to give the wrong answer, speak up louder. If you’re wrong, you’ve learned something new. Hiding in the back of the classroom doesn’t free you from failure, it just hides you, and hiding does nothing to help you learn and grow.

Tuum est: it is yours. My time at university is mine and mine alone, and I will use it to become the woman I know I can be, if I just stop hiding from failure.

Happy Imagine Day, UBC.