What you choose to include and omit ultimately determines the success of your memoir.The guest excerpt from ‘The Truth of Memoir by kerry Cohen in The writers digest talks about the different elements that are essential for the writer to consider when writing a family memoir.After reading the except i tried to analyze Fred Wah’s work in diamond grill to understand why he wrote the way he did, and why he chose to include certain specific details about particular events or characters.
According to Cohen, the first and most important element is to ‘know your purpose’; the underlying message in your memoir that you want to convey to your audience. The way Wah portrays his ancestors and family stories provides an insight to the life of Chinese-Canadians. It allows the readers to explore lives of the Wah family as an insider rather as a stranger who judges only based on what he sees. Reading Diamond Grill broadened by understanding about the struggles of Chinese people in Canada and i grew more sensitive to their hardships and how they had to deal with living among people of different race and ethnicities. Wah’s phrase “when you’re not “pure” you just make it up”(waiting for Saskatchewan), summarizes the experiences of people with dual nationalities and their attempts at fitting in with the dominant culture.
Another element mentioned in the excerpt was to ‘write with compassion’; which basically means to respect the past of all the characters in your family memoir, such as your parents and do justice to to their characters. When writing controversial stories about one’s families it can be hard to decide whether to sugar coat and keep pace with family or to feed the naked truth to the readers so they may better understand the message the writer wants to convey. Wah talks about his immediate and extended family in the book, and the intricacy with which he revealed the characters and their relationships is remarkable. He mentioned his great grandfather and how he got married twice and how he used to gamble money which he was supposed to save for his son (Diamond Grill 6).But later in the book he highlights his great grandfather’s caring and humorous side. Such depictions give a realistic touch to the characters and makes it easy for readers to relate to them.
In her article 7 mistakes to avoid when writing your memoir, Joanna Penn advises writers, ‘Do not try to appeal to everyone’. If a writer tries to do that, he will keep on moulding and reshaping his story till it loosed its original message the writer wanted to convey in the first place.Looking at the example of the Diamond Grill, it can be clearly seen that Wah is trying to target a specific audience. The way he introduces his characters is quite random and often not preceded by a proper reference of context, leaving room for doubt among readers. This factor rather goes hand in hand with another great tip by Joe Kita on How to write a memoir, where she advises the writers, ‘don’t begin at the beginning’. She elaborates on the idea of writing in a non-chronological order to make your memoir different from every other memoir on the book shelf. This is exactly what Wah tried to do, which often left me (as a reader) confused, lost as to where is the story headed or what is the writer implying. But i think the beauty of this form of memoir writing lies in the fact that the reader is woven into this mystery web where he tries to figure it out himself and that curiosity to figure it out, to solve that mystery is what keeps the reader glued to the book till he has finished it and finally understood it.
Last but not the least it is worth mentioning Cohen’s third factor ‘prepare for reactions’, because this is where she cautions the writers of the upcoming reactions of their family members, who they have written about. She explains how sometime their reaction can be negative and involves the risk of ruining your relationship with your parents, siblings or spouses, but telling the truth is sometimes more important then living a lie. Telling the truth may result in everything falling apart but atlas you wouldn’t have to hide or lie with your family about your feelings anymore. Or on the other hand understanding your perspective on a shared life event may clear misconceptions and generate a positive feedback in them. Wah was lucky enough to have the support of his family while writing Diamond Grill, but it seems that he understands that their is a line between the private and public that shan’t be crossed. In the acknowledgements for Diamond Grill he notes that the stories mentioned in the book are not all true stories but poses similar to what the family actually experienced, in a hope that he does not offend any of his relatives or other Chinese-Canadians, who have experienced some events better than Wah has.
Looking behind the scenes of the Diamond Grill, helped me figure out answers for most of my questions about his writing style and his way of describing some events in details while leaving out low level details from some memories or events.I hope this helps my peers as well as they go on to explore and figure out the story of behind the Diamond Grill for themselves and understand why Fred Wah included what he did in his family memoir.
Works Cited
Wah, Fred. Diamond Grill. Edmonton: NeWest, 1996. Print
Cohen, Kerry. “How to Write About Family in a Memoir | WritersDigest.com.” WritersDigest.com. The Writer’s Dig by Brian Klems, 22 Jan. 2015. Web. 24 Jan. 2016.
Penn, Joanna. “7 Mistakes to Avoid When Writing Your Memoir.” The Creative Penn. N.p., 14 Mar. 2012. Web. 24 Jan. 2016.
Kita, Joe. “Great Tips on How to Write Your Memoir.” Readers Digest. N.p., 12 Dec. 2010. Web. 24 Jan. 2016.