- You feel the need to try out all the nights at the student union that Canadians don’t’ even know exist – even if that results in you rapping Hotline Bling to a very empty room at Monday Night Karaoke at The Pit.
- You’re still very still extremely confused by Canadian currency to the point where your purse is weighed down with hundreds of near-identical silver coins, and cashiers often have to physically count the amount due out of your hand, with a disapproving look on their face.
- There’s no such thing as “savings” anymore. Wave goodbye to it all.
- You’re still adapting to being asked for 2 pieces of ID constantly – even if you only wanted an innocent post-lecture plate of nachos at Mahony’s.
- You’re constantly pretending you understand the Canadian politics references in your lectures, while trying to subtly continue reading The Guardian on your computer. Because, if we’re being honest- Boris Johnson rugby tackling a small boy is far more amusing than this election malarkey.
- You’re contacting your parents less and less regularly as your schedule fills up. Most importantly you’re learning Skype etiquette. Speaking to your parents for the first time in weeks while sat in pjs, forcing a takeaway pizza into your hungover mouth, is apparently not acceptable.
- You’re experiencing the stress of trying to apply for summer internships while explaining you have a “special circumstance” and no, you cannot attend the “mandatory” group task day – London is a tad too far for a day trip. And no, phone interviews at 2am my time are not okay.
- Sending embarrassing drunk messages are no longer acceptable because the receiver is innocently eating their breakfast, 100% sober, and will 100% judge you.
- You feel a constant need to do something tourist-esque with your time. Got in at 3am and need a Netflix session? Forget that, you’re hiking up a mountain side. And if you don’t then FOMO will come over your entire being. So get them walking boots on.
- You’ve mastered the “I only got here 3 months ago and don’t understand how the printer system works in Canada” excuse to blurt out to your prof when the essay you completed 5 minutes before the deadline is placed 8096th in the Irving print line queue.
- You get angry at the till every weekly grocery shop, moaning to your friends that you “Save On” nothing at “Save on Foods”, yet their suggestion of getting a bus for an extra 15 minutes to No Frills is completely out of the equation.
- It continues to anger you that pre-drinks are scheduled at practically mid-afternoon times in order to catch the bus downtown, and spend some time in the clubs that continue to close at the pathetic hour of 1am.
- There are many a Wednesday nights when you spend longer in macdonalds drunkenly forcing “poutine” into your mouth than you actually do dancing in Bimini’s.
- You cannot wait for Ski Season to begin at Whistler, despite the fact the last time you were on the slopes you were 10 years old and perfecting your snow plough.
- While your bank account sighs heavily as you purchase your student ski season pass, you ignore the fact that numerous final papers are due days after the weekend you’ve just booked a lodge in Whistler for. Essay or hot tub with mountain view? Not even a question worth asking.
- After all, You Only Canada Once.