Module 6

Overview

“I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve.” Albert Schweitzer.

Goals of this module:

• Introduce key elements of the learning relationship in an e-mentoring environment that reflects adult learning models.
• Identify some actions and processes that will support relationship building in mentoring partners.
• Participate in some technology-mediated activities that could help bridge the understandings between mentoring partners.

Mentoring Is…

Mentoring is a partnership that provides a space for conversation, that results in reflection, action and learning.

“Mentoring is about developing insight to turn hindsight into foresight.”

“Mentoring is interaction with another that facilitates the process of metacognition.”

Wong and Premkumar (2007) referenced Caffarella’s definition of mentoring as an “intense caring relationship in which persons with more experience work with less experienced persons to promote both professional and personal development” (p.3)

Mentoring is about establishing reciprocal relationships in the work environment that focuses on employee achievement and emotional support. Within mentoring relationships there is an exchange of knowledge, skills and procedures.

Mentoring views can include models of apprenticeship, competency and reflection. Apprenticeship: the mentor models for the person being mentored and the mentee learn from that observation. Competency: the mentee learns through sequential performance and feedback with the mentor. Reflective: the mentor assists the mentee to become a reflective practitioner.

Each of these views is incorporated in this module. The movement from seeing (apprenticeship) to doing (competency) and being (reflective) is an intended outcome of this e-mentoring course.

The activities in this module will move you through this process and extend your understanding of what it means to be a mentor for each of these views. You will move from seeing what mentoring is all about, to doing some mentoring actions with your protégé and then reflecting on that action in both your online journal and in the mentoring discussion forums with other mentors.

Focusing Understanding

“Each of us guards a gate of change that can only be unlocked from the inside. We cannot open the gate of another, either by argument or by emotional appeal.” Marily Ferguson, Educator and Writer.

Assertions and Assessments

Mentors need to be aware of their own individual biases as well as those of the individual they are mentoring. Viewing from a neutral stance is an important skill.  Watch this video clip. [http://www.theinvisiblegorilla.com/gorilla_experiment.html] Keep in mind that viewpoint is important. Think about how your own biases change what you see and how you see it. As you view this video remember that cultural and contextual biases can change perceptions and actions when working with individuals in mentoring relationships.

Bloom, et. al. investigated the understanding of assertions and assessments in terms of mentoring.

Assertions are defined as “facts that can be corroborated by a witness” and are based on observable, identifiable truths. They are either true or false, measured by some common standard, and do not represent the speaker’s opinion or judgement. Examples include: “It is 25 degrees celsius today.” “Four cars drove down the street.”

Assessments are defined as “speech acts that change our experience of reality and shape our future acts. They impact the way we behave. They are the fabric from which our interpretations are constructed.” (p. 36) They are informed judgements and opinions. Examples include: “It is hot today.” “This street is busy.”

Mentors need to be aware of their own assertions and assessments as well as those of the individual they are mentoring. Being able to identify when an assessment is being used as an assertion can help a mentor seek clarification or request the ‘evidence’. In this way the mentee will gain understanding and not limit future actions.

Now watch this video titled Monkey Business [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGQmdoK_ZfY]. How do the concepts apply to what we know about assertions and assessments? What does perception have to do with mentoring?

Reflection Task

Assessments impact future actions. As mentors, we need to be aware of our own assessments and how they impact our actions. For example, I make an assessment that it is going to be a stormy day so I will not drive to the beach. I make an assessment that my partner will not get their work done so I will do the work, just in case. Reflect on some of the assessments you may perceive to be assertions in your professional work or in your personal actions.

Take a moment to watch another video clip as a followup to the previous videos about the Invisible Gorilla and Monkey Business. As you view this video, think about how you apply perceptions, bias, active listening and assessments to your mentoring work. Watch this video about a ‘gorilla in our midst’.  This video will help mentors work with their mentees to address the 400 pound gorilla that may be in front of them but not visible.

Now, think about a ‘gorilla’ that may be in your midst. What challenging element or task are you facing that needs to be attended to? How do your assertions and assessments affect your perceptions of this ‘gorilla’. How do you make this invisible challenge become visible?

Post your response, questions, actions or any other reflections in the Module 6 – Mentoring: Assessments and Assertions discussion forum.

Reflections

“There is no happiness if the things we believe in are different than the things we do.” Albert Camus, Philosopher, Writer.

Powerful Questions

Effective mentoring includes the ability to ask questions to reveal information that is needed for both the mentor and mentee. Mentors should:

• a. Ask questions that reflect active listening and an understanding of the mentee’s perspective,
• b. Ask questions that will draw out personal discovery, insight, reflection or action (e.g., those that investigate assessments and assertions),
• c. Ask open-ended questions that generate clarity, possibility or new learning
• d. Ask questions that move the client towards established goals, not questions that ask for the individual to justify or look backwards.

Having Hard Conversations

Reflection Task

Having Hard Conversations with a mentee is part of the process. Applying all your professional skills and coaching attitudes will be needed when difficult conversations arise. Listen to the podcast [http://mentoring-works.com/podcasts.html] titled Issue #43 – Not Your Personal Google. Be prepared to share your insights, reflections or real life experiences.

Watch this clip from a popular t.v. series to reflect on mentoring relationships. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDxv9hSKdY4] How does this relate to your own personal mentoring experiences? Were those experiences difficult or challenging? If so, in what ways?

Think about how the podcast, the video clip and this quote can be used in your mentoring conversation. “There is no happiness if the things we believe in are different than the things we do.” As your relationship with a mentee deepens, how can you talk about challenging or difficult topics? How can you make this conversation a positive one for both you and your mentee.

Post your comments, questions, conversations or any other reflections in the Module 6 – Mentoring: Having Hard Conversations discussion forum.

Interactivities

“Those of us who attempt to act and do things for others or for the world without deepening our own self-understanding, freedom, integrity, and capacity to love, will not have anything to give others. We will communicate to them nothing but the contagion of our own obsessions, our agressivity, our ego-centered ambitions, our delusions about ends and means.” Thomas Merton, Philosopher.

Triple Loop Learning

Important elements of effective mentoring include interpersonal, communication skills, cultural proficiency and emotional intelligence. According to Bloom et. al. these skills must be addressed at the cognitive level as well as the deeper “change-resistant domains of disposition and personality.” (p. 83) Getting to the transformational level of coaching and mentoring requires mentees to change who they are.

One question that arises is “Can people learn new ways of being, or are our personalities, dispositions, and interpersonal skills fixed?” Effective mentors firmly believe that others can make fundamental internal changes. The process of transformation moves through three phases:

1. Knowledge, skills or ways of being are changed in small, continual steps.
2. Ways of thinking begin to change as success is achieved in new ways of doing. This results in reframing our view of what is possible.
3. The new ways of doing and ways of thinking become transparently part of who we are. Learning has fully integrated into our being.

loom et. al. referenced Robert Hargrove (1995) who described this process as triple loop learning. He defines “transformation coaching as a process that moves people beyond improved performance (single loop learning), to developing new ways of thinking (double loop learning), and ultimately to changing their ways of being (triple loop learning).” (p.85)

Bloom examined this notion with an example of a person learning to play the piano. At first, the learner plays short, easy melodies from memory. The double loop learning step includes learning how to read music, play more challenging and longer pieces of music and preparing for a performance. At the triple loop learning level, the learner is able to proficiently read music, play long tunes and compose music with confidence. The learner has become a musician. The learning process has transformed the individual into a new being.

Reflection Task ONE

Reflect on the steps you have taken to become an effective and supportive mentor. Complete the Mentoring Style Survey – http://www.mint-mentor.net/en/pdfs/Tool_Mentoring_Styles.pdf

What did you learn about your mentoring style? How does this style match the needs of the individual you are mentoring? How can you adapt this style to make the mentoring experience as effective as possible? Have you been transformed through the process of mentoring another individual? Has your mentee been transformed by the process, relationship and reflections? In what ways?

Post your results, thoughts, questions or reflections in the Module 6 – Mentoring: Transformational Mentoring discussion forum.

Conclusions

Transformational Coaching

The ultimate goal of any mentoring program is for mentors and mentees to achieve ‘triple loop learning’. There are common elements to transformational mentoring. These include:

• Start from breakdown – “Problems are our friends.” (M. Fullan) Every failure is an opportunity to learn. Mentors can assist the mentee to see beyond the superficial and look for the deep, underlying challenges.
• Listen to the mentee’s stories and test them. – Transformational mentors will use their skills to help the mentee become aware of underlying interpretations and explore alternatives.
• Use data to shift the mentee’s perspective. – Data can range from observations to surveys. Data can help a mentor focus on assertions rather than assessments.
• Develop and test interpretations and strategies to help the mentee work through problems or breakdowns. – Transformational mentoring includes testing perspectives and judgements to lead to change and movement.
• Help the mentee to construct new ideas, concepts, scenarios and open up the possibilities to new actions and ways of being. – “Turn rut stories into river stories.” First understand and question the ‘rut’. Then identify and reframe the interpretations of the ‘rut’. Finally, transform the ‘rut’ into positive action to build a ‘river’ story, or a new interpretation or action.
• Use scenarios and role play to help the mentee practice new ways of being. – Explore new possibilities at the cognitive level and rehearse the new actions and ways of being.
• Provide opportunities to rehearse, practice, walk-through possibilities. – Transformation takes time and small steps, well planned and practiced. Mentors and mentees create a space where reality can be suspended and new forms of actions and thoughts can be ‘tried on for size’.

Coaching and Mentoring – Who’s Tribe is it?

From our understanding and learning about mentoring, one question comes to light. Who will support the mentors. Listen to the podcast titled #71 – Who Mentors the Mentors?. [http://mentoring-works.com/podcasts.html]

What questions or ideas resonate for you in your context?

View the TED Talk by Seth Godin, well known author of Tribes. [http://www.ted.com/talks/seth_godin_on_the_tribes_we_lead.html]

Think about your own mentoring network, through this course or other contexts.

Post your results, thoughts, questions or reflections in the Module 6 – Mentoring: Transformational Mentoring discussion forum.