Hearing the poetic language in my young poets’ work is such a delight. In the teen years, it often flows freely from their pens and minds. I hope you enjoy these two pieces from the New Shoots Anthology.
My Comments…
What I love about Wednesday’s piece is how she creates a “dream within a dream within a dream” landscape. The reader never knows where they stand—nor does anyone when they’re dreaming. As we dream, things shift in the darkness of our minds and this is echoed in her musical line, “Dark and sweet, soft things my skin did skim.” Some other great lines are, “slowly drifting to a slow warmth,” “Chrysalides crunch underfoot” and “Clicking through the air / Ticking machinery unfurled.” She surely has a talent for hearing music in language. She is also a talented visual artist. The illustration of her “jelly world” in the image below is her creation.
Untitled
I dreamt once about a cove
This place I’ve been before
Floating far above high waves
Inside the bobbing submarine
Clicking through the air
Ticking machinery unfurled
I came upon a sight—
A mouth wide and gaping
Black, opening monstrous
I plunged into the dark quaking
Into the water I did swim
Dark and sweet, soft things my skin did skim
They pushed me unto a bank
For this, them I did thank
I had a dream about some bones
The water murky and green
The sea frothed and swirled
I felt my spine curled
Gliding through this hidden world
I had a dream about a shore
Chrysalides crunch underfoot
Set off at a burst, fly and sore
Among hollow caves I will weave
Until slowly drifting to a slow warmth, stop
Nestled inside this dream
I felt my spine curled
Ephemeral jelly world
Dull glow beneath the waves
I felt my spine curled
~By Wednesday La Plante
University Hill Secondary School, Vancouver
Grade 12
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My Comments…
This is the essential poetic moment—a beauty only perceptible to the naked eye and the poet longing to capture it, share its majesty. With this image, Sujin captures the feeling: “Like a silk curtain flowing / seamlessly in an open window, / the warm air wraps me / in its gentle whisper.” Marvellous!
Breathe
Sunbeams filt through leaves,
highlight their fragileness.
The foliage glows with emerald brightness.
Like a silk curtain flowing
seamlessly in an open window,
the warm air wraps me
in its gentle whisper.
It swirls around me, lifting my hair
and cooling my bare skin.
Smooth waves of sweet summer zephyr,
I can hear them in my ear,
telling me to breathe,
to take in its goodness
while it is here.
I rush in to grab my camera
so that I may keep this day forever.
The wind seems to call,
“Don’t go in yet!”
But I ignore its soft voice.
I run back out,
eager to capture the magic.
I take one picture, look at it in dismay;
no melodious ocean breeze,
no golden sunshine.
I try to hear the wind again,
but it is gone now,
back to its ocean home
where it belongs.
Sujin Park
University Hill Secondary
Grade 8/9 split