Several weeks ago, a piece of news went viral. A school girl killed her friend and mutilated her body because of jealousy. The reason was simple, the poor victim had a gorgeous appearance and she was more popular among peers, especially on social media. The murderer, her friend, couldn’t take it anymore, and not only killed her, but went out of her way to make sure nobody would mistake her for “beautiful” anymore.
Jealousy exists everywhere, and has so for as long as humanity has existed… it’s on the list of “seven deadly sins” for a reason!
Regarding social media, the comparison phenomenon caused by jealousy is ubiquitous as well. People tend to show their best moments on social media, they update their posts in order to collect likes and comments which can be seen as a way of craving attention. It’s undeniable that you are proud to get praised or comments from online friends. Then it turns out that the collection of likes and comments is more like a competition, which can be seen as a new social dynamic, a new form of social power. Let me give you some examples for the new dynamic. Have you ever glanced over your home page of social media software repetitively to see how many likes and comments you’ve got? It might be too exaggerating to compare this mundane phenomenon with returning to the crime scene, but you will feel a similar sense of satisfaction if you got a mountain of likes and comments. Have you ever felt jealous…even for a moment, of those who get more likes than you? Are they better than you? I’m sure that everyone has experienced this feeling, it’s natural. It totally can be understood that everyone gets jealous sometimes and our access to social media has allowed this jealous seed to grow into a full on tree. If the victim of this terrible murder didn’t cast such a powerful shadow with her social media, would she have even been targeted in the first place? I think not.
Can you remember what we were before? Decades ago, there was no social media software like Facebook or Instagram. Instead of over-indulging ourselves for empty fame, people were down-to-earth, which meant there was less comparison and jealousy. It’s not that it didn’t happen; we just weren’t presented with as many opportunities for it to happen. This “newness” can be proof that the generation gap is like an impassible barrier, the last generation are confused with the new phenomenon caused by advanced technology, while the new generation has never known life without it. On one hand it bridges the distance of the world, but it alienates people as well. When you go to a fancy restaurant, what would you do? You care less about the taste and pay more attention on how it looks like. You want everyone to know you are having dinner at a fashionable place. You’re engaged with social media and post photos online, and then you talk less to people around you. You become less connected with people you are supposed to be experiencing the dinner with.
Wake up, people! I appeal to everyone, put down your phones just for a while and talk with others. Don’t disguise yourselves with the mask of social media. Don’t make comparisons with fake information. Don’t leave the best moments on Facebook and Instagram, while hiding a darker reality.