Assignment 3.1 – Thu Vo’s Peer Review of Writing with You-attitude Memorandum for Brianna

TO:               Brianna, Member of team The TechniWriters, English 301 99C course

FROM:         Thu Vo, Member of team The TechniWriters, English 301 99C course T.V.

DATE:          March 4^th, 2019

SUBJECT:  301 Peer Review, Assignment 3.1 Writing with You-Attitude Memorandum for Brianna

Thank you for submitting your memorandum to Evan for assignment 3.1. Some suggestions below on how to write a memorandum with you-attitude will help improve your writing.

First impression:

This work follows closely the guideline for writing an effective memorandum. The guidelines are listed clearly in bullet point. The writing language is concise and professional.

Overall document lay-out and design:

• This is a well-organized document with clear sections.
• Assignment title (“Best Practices Memo”) is unclear. Please consider questions such as “What practices are you referring to?” or “Which assignment is this?” when clarifying your title.
• The title is missing at top of the document: Memorandum.
• After “From: Brianna”, please also provide your title and initials.
• There is an extra empty line before the conclusion.

Content:

• Introduction & Conclusion: The memorandum did not start with “I” and the pronoun “you” was also taken in writing, which shows the you-attitude toward Evan.
• Guidelines:
  • The consistency in using verbs ending with “-ing” at the beginning of each guideline is very eye-catching and easy to follow.
  • The memorandum continued to demonstrate the you-attitude toward Evan here by eliminating the word “you” and staying positive by focusing on what can be done.
  • Listing the guidelines according to the order of appearance in a professional email correspondence is a good way for the receiver (Evan) to learn and improve.
  • Expanding some suggestions with real examples from Evan’s work to further illustrate how he can improve upon his writing will be helpful.
  • Some guidelines, such as “Omitting unnecessary information that will not benefit the student”, can be clarified. It might be a good idea to explain what kind of information is viewed “unnecessary” and not beneficial?

Grammar and problems of expression:  Very good.

General statement:

The memorandum is concise, with simple and effective writing language. The you-attitude toward Evan has been successfully demonstrated in this memo. With the following edits, this will be an excellent document:

• Some minor changes in the lay-out and design of this memo would be highly recommended.
• Clarification or expansion of some guidelines will help to deliver your suggestions more effectively.

It has been a pleasure reviewing your work. Your questions are welcome.

Enclosure: 301 Brianna Writing with You-Attitude Memorandum