So I cried at school yesterday. It was kind of embarrassing. But generally, it’s always just funny looking back on times when you cry at school, it feels so dramatic.
So why was I crying? I was mad. Okay and slightly disappointed if we’re being honest. I was mad at Tec. I was mad at Tec because they have this stupid reputation to uphold. And because it’s such an obvious place for Mexico’s elite and rich (the tuition here is almost double that of UBC). I could go on with examples but I’ve thought about this bitterness I have against rich students here –because a lot of them are still really great people! Is it unfair to judge a person just based on the fact that they’re wealthy? Yes. But again, discussion for another blog post.
Last week, I was asked to write a speech (in spanish!) for the closing ceremony of the international students. I went to the ceremony last semester and it’s like this formal kind of boring event where they give completion diplomas and stuff like that.
Anyways, the speech. I was told specifically by admin to “not include any negative experiences you’ve had here, only the good things”. To be honest I thought that was a bunch of bullshit because that wouldn’t be my actual experience here. I was told they really wanted me to do it (not because of my spanish skills mind you haha—). However, they had some other options of people just in case. Eh. I was going to write and give a great fucking speech.
So I worked really hard on the speech. My literature/spanish prof helped me translate it. A speech that mentioned some amazing things I love about Mexico, but also some other stuff: Ayotzinapa, Tlatelolco 68′, and how I didn’t like being whistled at and called chinita (little chinese girl) on the street. Oh yeah and one small joke about Tec….
And guess what! After I sent in my speech I was told….nope. They gave it to some other french dude. A dude with a nice positive speech about Mexico (my prof read it).
So why am I pissed? It’s just a speech Saki. They told you at the beginning they might give it to someone else if they didn’t like it. Let me tell you why I’m pissed:
A) Tec is a university, and an institution of ‘higher’ learning that should encourage critical thinking, new ideas, and open discussions. Rather, they cut me off because I wasn’t all rainbows and bricks of gold coming out of my butt.
B) I wanted Tec to hear that there are those of us who are interested in real Mexican issues.
C) It’s important, especially as foreigners, to see past just the beautiful beaches and getting drunk on tequila. It’s important hear names like Ayotzinapa, and Tlatelolco, and to incorporate that into your idea as Mexico as well. I wanted people, especially foreigners, to hear the names—Say that it’s just important to know about these things is as important to rid the image of Mexico as being just violence and corruption.
D) I wanted people to know that as visitors we are privileged. That as students in Tec we are privileged. And also that if you have a penis in this country, your life here is a lot easier than that of a woman.
E) I just wanted to give some real talk. or I WANTED TO HEAR SOME FUCKING REAL TALK IN A RICH PRIVATE INSTITUTION THAT FEEDS US WITH TEC PROPAGANDA.
F) Also I put a lot of work into that speech, and I was really excited to give it in spanish. To practice and you know, kill it!
Obviously, me talking for five minutes infront of a crowd, while also trying to make them laugh, would not have accomplished these things. But I’d like to think it was a start. Now it’s just another white dude going on about the wonderful amazing time we had in Mexico.
PULL A KANYE THO ACTUALLY