Going into this class, I’ll be honest, I was a little intimidated. When we started with Combray by Marcel Proust, I genuinely struggled. It was probably the most difficult thing I’ve had to read in a long time. The sentences felt endless, the pacing was slow, and I kept rereading the same parts trying to figure out what was even going on. At one point, I remember thinking that if this was what the rest of the course would be like, I probably wasn’t going to enjoy it.
I think part of why that hit me so hard is because of my relationship with reading overall. Growing up, I loved reading. It was something I chose to do, not something I had to do. I could finish a book in a single day in high school and actually enjoy every second of it. University changed that for me. Reading started to feel forced. It became about deadlines, understanding everything perfectly, and getting through texts I didn’t always connect with. Over time, reading started to feel like a chore, which was frustrating because I knew how much I used to love it. Starting with Combray brought that feeling back. It made me feel like I had lost that version of myself who enjoyed reading so easily. As the course went on though, things started to shift. I became more patient with myself and stopped expecting to understand everything perfectly. I started to focus more on the experience of reading instead of treating it like something I just had to get through. Hearing other people’s perspectives also helped a lot, since it showed me that confusion is actually a normal part of reading, not a sign that I was doing something wrong.
One of the biggest turning points for me was reading Nada by Carmen Laforet. That was one of the books I genuinely enjoyed. It felt more natural to read while still being meaningful. I didn’t feel like I had to force myself through it. I could actually connect with Andrea and her experiences, and it reminded me of what it feels like to get into a book again. Looking back now, I feel like I’ve rebuilt my relationship with reading. It’s not exactly the same as when I was younger, though it feels a lot closer than it did before this class. I can appreciate literature in an academic way while still enjoying it personally, which is something I didn’t think I would get back.
Discussion question: Did this course change the way you think about reading, and do you feel closer to the kind of reader you used to be?