By Mary on January 22, 2017
The Benefits of “Long Distance Relationships” — How our sense of ‘Community’ has broadened.
How we are home to each other on our virtual front porches, now that we are not often home to each other on our real front porches….
Jooay — Connecting children and youth with disabilities to leisure
I would argue against the “connected but alone” (Sherry Turkle, 2012) statements that have proliferated with concerns over our growing dependence on the virtual, the mobile connection versus the physical connections we “used to have”. Personally, I think there is an element of idealization and romanticism of our lives “before virtual connection” at work here along with sensationalist and hyperbolic arguments against the increase in virtual connection. Pendulums swing, as do our cultural perceptions and practices. Certainly, we should remain mindful of our choices in how we spend our lives, our time, and how we connect with ourselves and each other. However, let’s keep in mind the full reality of the pros and cons of those changes and evolutions in our society, in our community rather than blindly finger pointing.
I would argue that rather, the face of community and the sharing within community has changed, and that our reach has extended. Families that are far apart can now keep up somewhat with each other’s lives through social media like Facebook. Facebook can be the spatter approach — you can “hit” more people with a Facebook post than you could in previous times with personal letters. Do you remember in the 90’s when “mass letters” became popular? Or maybe it was just in my international teaching community — at Christmas you would get the not personalized letter, but the typed up ‘newsletter’, personal to that individual’s letter distribution list — update of a family. Who is doing what, where would be sent out to all of the friends and family you couldn’t get together with in person. And, similar to Facebook, it was an intentional, “published” account of a life. It was mobile culture communication through physically written, licked-stamp text.
Families have spread farther apart. What about Community, our sense of Community? Who do we belong with? How do we feel a sense of belonging? Certainly, virtual communities offer new opportunities to connect for marginalized populations. We are no longer restricted to the beliefs and cultures within our small towns. Like minds can connect across time and space. I believe this to be an enriching facet of our mobile, virtually connected world.
Let’s look at how virtual communities, — long-distance communities can and do serve some of the functions of our physical, front-porch communities. Sharing. Neighbours and communities share tools, services, information, support, ideas, enrichment, leisure and recreation….
Jooay, the app pictured above, offers connection to accessible activities for disabled children in our communities, but broadcast through this virtual community.
The Sharing Depot advertises itself as “Canada’s First Library of Things”. Just as we borrow tools from our neighbours, this physically real, virtually advertised, place offers members the opportunity to, “Borrow thousands of items including camping and sports equipment, house party supplies, board games and toys for $50/year.” These “neighbours”, within this large city, can share and benefit from each other. As well, they offer swapping events, workshops and a safe “Bunz” exchange depot.
Bunz is a, “trade-based community for exchanging goods and services”. This article on Treehugger describes how Bunz began. Essentially, it was the search for community support in hard times. A virtual community has sprung from this initial quest.
Similarly, while Craigslist may not always offer free things, it is a way for people to connect with things or services they need. Many in the tiny house community talk about how they found the items they needed to build their tiny homes and to cut costs through free or cheap items found on Craigslist.
People and caregivers with rare medical conditions may not find community support nearby due to the rarity of the condition. Websites such as Dravet.ca and the accompanying open to members only, Facebook community offer support and assistance for caregivers. This blog, written by Donna Thomson, The Caregiver’s Living room, has offered support and inspiration to many who are otherwise isolated. These neighbours may not be able to bring a meal, but comfort and support are offered here.
This list could go on and on. Who are your virtual neighbours that you rely on?
Thank you! A nice post for virtual communities and digital communication. I guess it is much more important for immigrants than for anyone else. I didn’t know about mass letters.
Although a little long, I loved reading this post. It challenges a lot of views held today by those that see technology as a barrier to building connections and strong relationships. Mary explains, very thoughtfully, how this view is often a result of romanticizing the “old days”. I will not repeat the examples Mary has mentioned, however, the post is even more relevant today in times of isolation and social distancing than it was when she published it a few years ago. Personally, technology allows me to have more and better relationships than what I would have without it. As a millennial and an introvert, I am not going to pick up the phone and just call someone, whether friend or family. My family lives on different continents and if not for technology, I’d hardly ever communicate with them. The times have changed since those “old days” when people did not have access to the same networking possibilities that we do now. Making use of these apps and connectivity tools does not have to mean compromising the quality of relationships. Yes, with a lot of kids and social media these days, quantity trumps quality, but even they grow out of it. The need for popularity and being liked gets replaced with more meaningful, tight-knit relationships as they get older. This is not that different from older generations wanting to fit in and be part of the cool groups at school. Would you agree?