Blog – franny’s room ♡

I cannot believe it, we are at the final book in this class. Congratulations everyone! I hope you enjoyed the blogs I’ve written, along with the books we read together <3

I am happy to say that I thoroughly enjoyed this book! The subject matter is undoubtedly heavy, but the sense of (twisted) girlhood while trying to go against the “pre-destined” events (and rules) of life was captivating to hear. Notably, unlike previous books, I opted to listen to the audiobook (mainly because of easter weekend), which added to my experience. The translation is not exactly the same; I think it was created into more dialogue than descriptions, unlike the book. However, the story was equally as fascinating!

(Listen to it if you have the chance, it is an awesome listen/read!)

My initial thoughts on this book were optimistic. Based on its name alone, I assumed it would be a somewhat wholesome story of two friends as our main character, Elena, expressed her love for her best friend. Notably, this is not the case. It is unhealthy and ELENA is deemed to be the brilliant friend

The friendship between Elena and Lila is something I would consider borderline toxic, especially if I had that dynamic in my life. The competition was jarring and seemed to be masked under some clever pettiness or comment. Their friendship usually only seemed apparent when they needed each other help, debated about Latin or Greek or any language skills, and when they needed protection. Moreover, they both held resentment for each other, sometimes said directly or interwoven with their comments. Evidently, Elena was envious of Lila’s academic strength and outspoken nature, while Lila was envious of Elena’s opportunities and the sense of “freedom” from them. It was a push and pull between the both of them.

The care they had for each other is shown towards the end of the book, especially in the scene where Elena helps Lila get ready for her wedding, washing her. In the audiobook, Elena describes how beautiful she is, and for the first moment, I can sense no envy in her comments. However, compared to the novel, it’s interesting to see Elena’s swarm of emotions: envy, sexual desire, anger, hostility, sorrow and pity.

“I helped her dry off, dress, put on the wedding dress that I—I, I thought with a mixture of pride and suffering—had chosen for her.” (pg 313)

If anything, this sentence shows the complexity of the emotions they share for each other. As best friends, I cannot condone this kind of friendship to have, as it is rarely supporting and encouraging to each other.

However, I keep thinking back to the statement said in the lecture video:

“Necessity imposes a taste for necessity which implies a form of adaptation to and consequently acceptance of the necessary, a resignation to the inevitable.” (Pierre Bourdieu)

While I do not personally want this friendship, I cannot condemn it too much because I am not experiencing an environment like theirs. They are trapped in a world of poverty, violence, misogyny, and classism. Out of necessity, Lila had to study through Elena’s textbooks, or Elena had to rely on Lila’s demeanour in her inner voice. They are consistently trying to adapt and survive while trying to overcome the set-in-stone customs of their town. Lila does not want to resign to the inevitable clearly, so she seeks Elena’s friendship as a tool. In both ways, they can support each other in their environment despite the apparent toxicity of it.

Questions: How would you define Elena and Lila’s friendship? Do you think it is healthy both in our standards and in the context of their environment?

Marcel Proust has written a truly in-depth and meticulously detailed story with Swann’s Way. When I first began reading the chapter Combray, I honestly resented it a bit. This is because every sentence seemed to be enriched with too much detail. It was confusing to read or fully immerse myself in the next. More frustratingly, I was flip-flopping between thoughts of “this is impossible to understand” and “this is amazingly written.” From describing the long sequence of his sleeping environment or his odd but endearing obsession with kisses, I could not figure out my genuine opinion of the story.

What confused me (besides the confusing phrasings at times) was my resentment while reading this. I think these feelings arose because I do not think I could recall my own childhood to the same degree. I had my own fair mix of happy, sad, traumatic, and goofy moments growing up, but it would be more than difficult if I tried to pinpoint a specific example or day right now. Simply trying to recall my past memories is hard, but Proust had the ability to write and share his recollections elegantly — thus making me feel resentful and aggravated.

Despite this, I did encounter multiple times where I could not put down the text. I became fully engrossed in the story, imagining what he wrote out. It was lovely. You can wholeheartedly feel the nostalgia and yearning for his childhood days through the texts. From the descriptions of the warmth of the fireplace, the cold air of the summer, and the nights and streets of Combray, I felt like I was in his shoes. It is an impressive feat when the writer can make the reader feel an ounce of nostalgia, especially when it is not their own memories or experiences. Proust has a special skill with detail. His entire monologue about flowers (an occurring theme) left me in awe. What is extraordinary is that it is not a simple description of the number of petals or colours; it mixes elements that occur outside of the visual sense. For example, he associates it with adolescents, a season you can never return to, or a “bouquet sent from a traveller that will never return.” Feelings are mixed into his descriptions: awe, longing, yearning, reflection, and nostalgia.

As a result, I both feel resentment and awe towards Proust’s story and writing abilities. Still, it is not unfair to say some of his sections are overexplained or disconcerting to read. This is credited to his sexist viewpoints about women at certain times — that they are only for men’s pleasure. Additionally, his detailed recall of asking for more kisses from his mother was a little…odd. Primarily when he briefly discussed his father’s resentment. At the same time, I am reminded of Freud’s Oedipus complex while trying to disagree it is more about wanting more of his mother’s love or attention. Either way, I do not want to let Freud win this time, so I’ll continue in ignorance bliss.

Memorable quotes: “Summer bedrooms where you delight in become one with the soft night, where the moonlight leaning against the half-open shutters casts in the enchanted ladder at the foot of the bed, where you almost sleep in the open air.”

“May the sky remain forever blue for you, my young friend; and even at the hour which is now approaching for me, when the woods are dark already, when the night is falling fast, you will console yourself as I do by looking up at the sky.”

My question to you is: Did you feel nostalgic reading this text? Did it move you in any way?

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franny’s room ♡

Tag Archives: Blog

Best friends? Enemies to lovers to stangers? More like borderline frenemies girl…. ~ My Brilliant Friend

My Resentment, Confusion and Awe of Swann’s Way ~ Proust