Tag Archives: memory

Amulet by Roberto Bolano

This novel was interesting. I especially liked the conviction and control the narrator uses at the beginning. Letting us know she is in charge of telling the story. The opening lines of the text are so thought-provoking, as they preface the story as being of horror but refusing to tell it as such a story. Also how she pours out a bunch seemingly about herself within the first few pages. We get to know about her process while she writes almost all of her thoughts down – line by line. These types of narration are what I like. It’s like a conversation – someone truly explaining their thought process, detail by detail. It helps me keep engaged with the story and listen to it with curiosity.

The approach that the narrator takes by making a horror story seem not-so-much like one was imaginative. It was like she was very level-headed and great at (for lack of a better term) comforting herself, while also softening the blow of how terrifying of an experience she had for readers. Auxilio’s more relaxed and ordinary way speaking when narrating aids in a gentle output of a panic story, as well as making her seem more believable. When novels are overly detailed and dramatic, I start to sense a bit of ingenuity and too much exaggeration – like they’re trying to sell and push the story too hard. Whereas this is a good middle-ground, it unveils the story to be believable without excessive convincing.

However, I did question some areas – as she was doubting herself when recalling some incidences. But memory is interesting, as over the years it can become misconstrued and lack some details wherein we may input our own or what we’d like to believe.

Being in such a position as Auxilio, I have no idea how I’d handle it. I’d like to say I do well under pressure, but this is more than an astronomy test that I didn’t study enough for. It comes down to life and death, not just a quick right moment at the right time either, spanning over almost 2 weeks. The amount of contemplation I would be going through is inexplicable.

I wonder how the story would have turned out if it was written from a horror or thriller perspective. I’d imagine that I would be even more engaged as those are my go-to genres for reading, movies, and more. So my question is, do you think you would have enjoyed the novel more or less if it was depicted from a horror-story stance? And why?

W, or The Memory of Childhood by Georges Perec

This novel confronts the theme of memory quite differently than the others we’ve previously read. Most of the texts I’d read before this speak from a point of memory, past-tense, and experience, whereas Perec approached memories that weren’t there. It brought an alternate perspective of how some have the privilege of accessing and reflecting on such memories, and others not so much – for various reasons. An assumption I made based on the lack of childhood memories was that it was due to trauma, mainly because of the war. Many can dissociate from a time in their life when it’s tied to some sort of trauma, war being a likely trigger.

Although I haven’t necessarily lost my sense of childhood memories, I do relate to how the past can become twisted or jumbled up in one’s mind. Thinking about certain times in my life prove to be either recounted as differently than they were or just completely missing from my mind. However, I can’t seem to pinpoint when I lost the clarity or how it was lost. Having this self-reflection period made me connect with the novel more, it’s nice when a text can make you think.

Something that I question though, is the title. Maybe it’s a play into the whole loss-of-memory theme, but it seems like Perec is unsure of it. Just the presence of “or” being there, like it’s up for debate or something. Then again, it could be to do with the double story. Where one is intertwining with the other, so there’s two titles combined. It would be interesting to know whether it was purposeful or out of hesitance.

A connection that was though-provoking between the two stories was the island and the Holocaust. The fact that the narrator could make this connection, unless it was unintentional, shows me that there is some recollection there. With the violent games and the concentration camps. Though it could be that it just happens to correlate, it seems more like it was thought out.

Having that the narrator appears to have lost some parts of their childhood, assuming it’s due to trauma from the Holocaust, I wonder how common it is for for others who survived it as well. I may have to do some research on that. In that I will ask, do you feel like you know your childhood well, and why? Even more so, for the parts you may not remember, is it due to trauma or why do you think those parts are missing?

Bonjour Tristesse by Françoise Sagan

I decided to look up the author, as I do with most of what I read, and was surprised to find that Françoise Sagan was only 18 years old when she published Bonjour Tristesse. Also that it was her first novel and is her most popular novel ever published. This was inspiring to find. That one could have such a lasting effect with their writing, even if it was their first and only at the age of 18. Here we are in 2022, 68 years after Bonjour Tristesse‘s publication, and continuing to derive meaning from it.

Now, although I bring up the fact that memory appears to be a theme of Romantic writing, at least based off of the reading list we have access to, I have just recently discovered that it is not coincidental. It was gently calculated (haha) by Jon, our professor. It just so happens by chance that we have encountered many texts in reference to memory or reminiscing or past experience. However, this will not prevent me from making these types of connections from text to text.

Specifically, the main character being a young woman and the idea of moving, introduced early on in the novel, reminded me of Nada by Carmen Laforet, which I read last week. Laforet’s novel also followed a similar theme of memory. These texts were also similar in the modern aspect of them, for which they confronted concepts that teenagers should not, but often do, have to deal with. For example, in Nada the chaos inside of her house and problems from her family intertwining with her life and in Bonjour Tristesse, Raymond’s personal life with his mistress, Elsa, intertwining with Cécile’s thoughts and uncertainty of her and whether she was threatening to their father-daughter relationship. Additionally, Laforet’s novel involved sexual themes like Sagan’s, exploring language that can be seen as support for sexual liberation – something that may have been looked down upon in that day and age, of when Bonjour Tristesse and Nada were published. These novels are great at exploring modernity and push to dive into themes like sexuality, teenage thoughts, empowerment of women, and more – so much like what we see today.

With this I would like to ask, could you personally see yourself expressing these intense themes with the public eye watching over you? The first thing that comes to mind is age, the fact that Sagan was only 18 when she published this novel shows the true confidence and comfortability she had within herself. I feel as if I already express intense themes as such, with my music – through lyrics – figurative speech – explicit language. Just not caring about what an outsider would have to say, but that’s just me.

Combray by Marcel Proust

(Particular to Part 1)

First things first, this text had me truly puzzled and even felt chaotic at times.
Specifically, it hopped from describing one thing to another so quickly, almost without transition. It was difficult for me to stay focused and keep a general idea of what was occurring throughout all of my reading, with Proust getting into specifics of every single possible detail. There was a point that seemed like he was describing unnecessary elements of the story, just to purposely throw you off trajectory of what he’s actually trying to convey. An example of this that comes to mind is on page 12, where we go so far into Bathilde and her husband’s drinking problem. Maybe I just don’t see the connection to the rest of the story, but these parts of the text directed me away from continuing. However, although I did not feel the need to have these extra details, I did enjoy the diction and imagery that Proust used in these sections. He really brought these parts of the text to life and allowed me to imagine it, to feel as if I was overlooking these moments as they happened.

Being honest, I’m still having a hard time piecing together what I read and how it comes together as a part of a larger story. The density of each page and constant divulging into semi off-topic anecdotes kept pushing me away from retaining the actual important information to understand what was taking place. At one point, I was trying to discern if this was a recollection of a not-so-disturbing but baffling fever dream.

Though I must say it was not all bad. Some areas, such as the speaker’s mother approaching Swann about his daughter, were interesting and had me invested in how the characters would respond. I also found some aspects relatable, such as having guests over while I’m in my room just waiting on them to leave.

Also, I feel as if it may be partially my own doing on why I found this text difficult to follow. I didn’t read the entire chapter all in one sitting, so as I sat down the following couple days to continue reading I may not have retained the points that were crucial to grasp the ideas Proust was laying down.

A question I had as I read this amazingly confusing chapter of Combray was “why does this text, or does Proust feel the need to, contain so many misleading features on the way to discovering the story at hand?” Maybe with all components of this entire text it makes more sense, or maybe it’s on purpose – as a challenge. I look forward to further discussion on this topic and how others feel in relation to reading Combray by Marcel Proust.