These are from the tops of the picnic benches at Pembroke Castle. What makes them especially fun (other than the ratings out of five stars spelled out in severed heads) is that each of these reviews is written by, and reflects the experiences of, a figure from the castle’s history:
Roger de Montgomery was a close compatriot of William the Conqueror; he founded Pembroke Castle and subdued the native Welsh.
Richard de Clare, called Strongbow, was a son of Gilbert de Clare (I’ve posted about Red Gilbert before—he’s my favorite Marcher Lord, the one who slaughtered the Jews at Canterbury, joined the Baron’s Revolt and then switched sides, ticked off all his Marcher Lord neighbors and lost to them in legal battles, and then died, at which point his wife married his squire and his drinking ewer ended up in the Swansea museum). Anyway, Richard de Clare, his son, was an early Marcher Lord who built up Pembroke Castle and then spearheaded the Norman invasion of Ireland:
Rhys was a Welsh king at a time when the Norman Marcher Lords were getting more powerful and starting to push the native Welsh of Pembrokeshire northward:
William de Valence was another Marcher Lord embroiled in the Barons’ Wars, who had to flee the country more than once from Pembroke Castle:
Jasper Tudor was an uncle and guardian of Henry VII, who was born at Pembroke Castle. At some point during the convoluted War of the Roses, Jasper and Henry fled to France to gather support:
Pembroke Castle seems to have passed back and forth a few times between the Roundheads (Oliver Cromwell’s Parliamentarian forces) and the Cavaliers (the Royalist forces). By the end of the war, the castle was back in Roundhead hands, at which point Oliver Cromwell ordered it burned:
