Old Sock Drawer

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#027: Multiple orders of business!

November 19th, 2008 by Mary Leong

Currently listening to: “Foux de Fafa” – Flight of the Conchords

hello, I am Mary, hear me ramble.

Order of Business Numero UNO:
HEY JAYNE, I HEAR YA. The first thing you learn in Arts One is that you can’t write. Not even for change, baby. Not even Plato can save you. You’re in the cave. And you can’t get out. But I digress, as usual.

Order of Business Numero DEUX:
Twelve-year-olds, IT’S OKAY. You can RELAX. The world is not coming to an end. Yes, the Twilight movie is coming out. IT IS SERIOUSLY ALRIGHT. Don’t forget to breathe. (Or you know…don’t…let’s see…uhm.)

And on the same note, is there any real good reason why is Indigo selling Twilight t-shirts? What are we, the Gap? American freaking Eagle? Are we going to sell out and become the TNA of the book industry? Are we going to start selling tank tops for $50 – NO. WAIT.

I will rephrase that.

It’s really not our fault. We sell books. We’re just doing our job. BUT Twilight has blown out of proportion. A faintly entertaining novel with great potential to be read aloud in a sarcastic manner has been seized and taken hostage by the movie industry, as usual. I actually found the books quite entertaining. I had nothing against them in particular. In typical consummate Hollywood style, the industry is just so desperate to latch onto the next kids’ bestseller, make it into a movie featuring some unknowns, and market their end product (“I’d rather die than stay away from you”? “You are my life now”? WTF? Aren’t they like, seventeen???) to aforementioned hyperventilating twelve-year-olds, rendering themselves, and the kids, absolutely incomprehensible to polite society.

Even more puzzling to me are the 40-year-old women who read the books. I can’t quite imagine why, unless you were a highly worried parent wondering what sort of madness has stricken your poor and unfortunate child in throes of Twilightmania.

Order of Business, Numero TROIS:
T’is the season for wellies!!!!!!!!!

With that, I shall leave you now.
Ta, till the next time!

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1 response so far ↓

  • 1 Laurie Marie Nov 24, 2008 at 4:57 pm

    I’m going to see it. I liked the first few books, but just as frivolous entertainment. And I’m going to see the movie because a) as a Professional Writing student I need frivolous entertainment that doesn’t involve reading and b) because I want to see how it sizes up to the book (which it won’t. Books-to-movies never do).