À la Andy Sachs, in The Devil Wears Prada, one of my favourite movies. That was the thought going through my head as I stood at the bus stop at 7:05 a.m.

I’m – pause. I was about to say “one of those people” but the likely possibility that there are not many people who do this besides crazy film fanatics/ wanna-be producers/ keeners in film studies is fairly high. Nonetheless, you know when a movie you’ve seen correlates to what you’re doing in real life? Life imitating art, instead of vice versa. Does anyone else want to play the same song that’s going on in the background, because some music and sound editor has spent countless hours choosing the correct music that matches up to the tone and feel of that scene? Well the opening primping montage of this movie set to “Suddenly I See” by KT Tunstall gets me pumped up every time. Just the lyrics itself kicks some self-motivation butt (as in kicks your butt out the door to go do something i.e. change the world), so ladies, if you ever wake up and need to channel some confident-hot-woman-“I can do this shiznit!”-power into your day I suggest turning up this song. Every one must have some kind of morning rush song that gets you going. No? Maybe it’s because I’m a morning person.

Actually, during the school year I thought that I was just kind of an all-the-time person. Both night owl and morning “person”. (Conveniently, I also have day dreams that I’m WonderWoman shhhhhhh). Once I moved out last week I came to the startling revelation that – no, Nicole, these people don’t exist. If they do the sleep deprivation has not hit them yet. Because oh, boy, does it hit. Also quite conveniently, I crashed into my wall of bricks Saturday morning. Cue exhaustion sickness.

Part of me thinks this might’ve been bad Karma because my friend got sick two weeks ago when he finished exams super early. He asked me [I paraphrase] “Doesn’t that ever happen to you? When you’re going hard for so long, really pushing it, and then once you stop you get sick.” Besides the fact that my friend is prone to several That’s What She Said moments daily, I looked up at him and gave him my straight face answer – “No.” So yeah blame it on the alcohol (not), blame it on the karma, blame it on myself really.

From staying up all night on the last night of rez to watch (along with 2 billion other people) THE Royal Wedding of the century then packing afterwards, from two fire drills in a row at 3 a.m. the nights before, from mad exam studying. This was a long ways coming.

Not good. This will probably not be the last time, but I hope that future Nicole allows herself 2 days rest afterwards. Honestly, these are the moments that make the university experience what it is.

This “Suddenly I See” song pretty much sums up my life right now. It took me 8 months to come to this realization. But suddenly I see how much my parents encourage me to go after my dreams, how much I love this city, how lucky I am to live in a democratic country, how passionate I am about my interests, where I’m headed with my future, my true goals. Suddenly I see where I belong. I had my long awaited a-ha moment on the SkyTrain. I was actually on my way back to UBC and I also realized how scared I still am but how assured I knew where I was going. I’ve heard of that moment when you realize you’re here. Here being the allusive wherever. Vancouver, British Columbia, The West Coast, Canada, The Earth, cosmic sense of universal unity. Sometimes I was looking for it, in the back of my head thinking “Is this it? Is this what it feels like?”. But that moment when I felt scared, that’s when it hit me. This entire year I think I was still running on some type of adrenaline summer camp rush, but the fact that I’m not going home for the summer has made me nervous. Suddenly I see this is what, where and who I want to be.

Back to me waiting at the bus stop Wednesday morning. I got up so early just at the mere panic attack that I was going to be late. First day on the job, you want to be on time right. Well because transit in Zone 3 stinks after being on time, to getting off at the wrong stop, to walking around like a lost person with nothing but Girl Guide intuition and a terribly destroyed Translink pocket map (God bless that piece of paper that I cling on to with all my life – every student using transit MUST have one of these!) I miraculously still arrived as scheduled 28 minutes early. So I got to sit in the park and watch the elderly Chinese ladies do their Tai Chi for 20 minutes before the museum opened. Oh did I mention that part? Yes, I’m working as the a museum assistant for the summer. Yes, Nicole is one step closer to living the dream.

And for those of you wondering, I went with raisin bread and marmalade over an onion bagel.